Am I selfish?

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My boyfriend's parents are both elderly and sick. His father has copd and mom has Parkinsons. I had to quit my job and take over caregiving. His father is relatively easy to deal with and cooperates fully. His mother on the other hand is demanding and I'm at the end of my sanity. She needs around the clock care and is refusing to be placed in a facility. She purposely pees on floor to get her own way and expects people to wait on her. I've been put on antidepressants and my doctor is concerned. The problem is my boyfriend and his brother won't take control of the situation. I am angry and resentful and do not want this responsibility and I want my life back. They turn it around and say I hate her and am selfish. The social worker says she has rights and can refuse help from agencies to have me do everything. How do I deal with this situation?

4 Comments

OMG No.. you are not being selfish. The situation you are in is bad enough if they are your parents.. much less your boyfriends! I would get out of there..don't let this destroy your life...
That's not a boyfriend. Get rid of him. You have no obligation to be a free employee to him. This sounds like a very bad situation, particularly because you don't even have a ring on your finger to tie you to the family. Thank goodness! You are free and clear to leave.
Honestly we've been together 15 years and it's my choice not to get married. That's because his parents improperly transferred assets to him during a bankruptcy so now he's liable for their irs debt. Yesterday his mom hit me because I won't give her alcohol and I'm conspiring with doctors because she was in icu over liver failure. The problem is his brother and sister in law another social worker are telling her the doctors are trying to drum up business for friends by suggesting a nursing home.
This sounds even worse. My advice would be the same as above, but only you can decide what to do.

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