Follow
Share

He has afib with a pacemaker that paces 99% of the time and is on blood thinner along with heart meds. When he had triple bypass a few years ago, he was on the bypass machine 6 hours and then a ventilator almost a week. He just hasn’t been the same.

Find Care & Housing
My mother has onset dementia. I pasted post its around the house to remind her. She's left the gas stove on & left the dog was outside on hot days. For us the notes helped alot. Good luck
Helpful Answer (0)
Reply to Tflowers
Report

There comes a time, and this is it,
when he needs constant supervision.
He already has a diagnosis of Alzheimers/dementia?

This is called cooking together.

There are medications that cross the blood/brain barrier and cause dementia
symptoms. Arrange for an immediate consult with his doctor.

Is there agitation, being argumentative, uncooperative?
Look into this with you present at the doctor's visit.

How is your health, and memory?
Do you also have some challenges?

Go to the websites giving advice for Alzheimer's dot org.
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to Sendhelp
Report

I would be very concerned.
Another way to response is: why haven't you been concerned up to this point knowing what has transpired? What is getting in your way to take needed action(s)?

He could set the house on fire.
With you in it.
In the middle of the night . . .
When you are sleeping.

Have you had a consult with his MD?
If not, this seems imperative to do as soon as possible.
Perhaps it is time to consider AI or a memory care unit.
It sounds like he - and you - are not safe in your home.

(If I were you, I would take the knobs off the stove).
Or lock the door to the kitchen (although I know many houses do not have doors any longer).

Some adjustments / preventative measures need to be put in place immediately - before something seriously dangerous happens.

Talk to a social worker at hospital he goes to and/or ask for a social worker referral from his MD office. You need help to manage this situation ASAP.

Gena / Touch Matters
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to TouchMatters
Report

Maybe he should not be in the kitchen all together, with the sharp utensils, knives, forks, etc. He could accidently cut himself with a knife if he did not handle it correctly for example; if there is a blender and/or food processor, that could be of concern as well.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to cover9339
Report
TouchMatters 16 hours ago
Yes, more along the lines of what I just wrote. Anything could happen in the kitchen in extreme adverse ways / behaviors. Don't wait until something happens. Must do some preventative measures now. Gena
(0)
Report
Pbit100: Yes, you should be very concerned. Thank goodness you noticed that he left the stove on! He needs a doctor appointment posthaste.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to Llamalover47
Report

Most definitely be concerned. It seems he's starting to mentally deteriorate and this will only get worse with time. The brain is short circuiting and this will lead to falling also. Time to childproof what you can,block off staircases, too. My mother used to rely on her small microwave on the counter for heating things up. I hope hubby isn't driving,scrapes and dents are the signs of impairment, too. I feel sad for you as you're transitioning from wife to caregiver,it must have been hard after the triple bypass. Come back if you need anything! There's really helpful people here, great support!
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to JuliaH
Report

Extremely Concerned! Get him evaluated by his doctor. Forgetting about the stove is dangerous. If he doesn't have POA, see an attorney as soon as possible to set up his agents for legal backup. In the event he becomes incapacitated, an agent can act on his behalf for his care. From what I now gather here, your husband may require 24 hour supervision.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to Patathome01
Report
Patathome01 18 hours ago
Makes no sense my answer goes without a vote. Why is my answer not good advice??

Get your father evaluated by his doctor for normal vs abnormal behavior.

A timer can be set to remind the cook that food is done. But an impaired person may have no judgment and forget that and perhaps other things.
(0)
Report
We all forget something, once in a while. However, there is reason to be concerned when we forget something like this in greater frequency.

By the way, an expensive option to keep in mind is that if you might be replacing your range soon you can get one with a "sabbath mode" option. Kitchen aid makes one, some others do, too. When you put the range on "sabbath mode" anything that is on will turn itself off after a certain number of hours. Obviously, this is made for Jewish customers who are observant of the rules of the sabbath, so the stove will turn itself off, thereby not entailing any "work" by the cook. I have often thought that the marketing departments of ranges should market this more widely. Many of us would like a safety check that would turn things off after a set number of hours, but could be cancelled for a long-cooking stew or a manic day of making dozens of cookies for a bake sale.

I have forgotten to turn off the stovetop or the oven a number of times in my lifetime with damages ranging from none to ruining a very expensive pan. Fortunately, no fires. I would say the frequency of this is about once every 5 or 10 years, but each one is pretty scary when you discover it. Now in our mid-70's my husband and I will sometimes catch each other in little things like this. I sort of keep track. As long as we only forget little things like turning off the stove or putting the sugar away on a fairly rare basis--once every month or so--I figure we are ok. If it gets to be a regular thing, though, it is time for checking in with the doc. I don't include things like where did I leave my keys? I have been misplacing keys, my watch, stuff like that, since I first came to possess them. The problem there is that there is no official place for them so they could be in a purse, a pocket, or on a counter top somewhere in the house. It is the stuff we never forget that is of concern. That includes turning off the stove, closing and locking the doors on the car and the house, closing the refrigerator door, flushing the toilet after use, etc. Those things that we do by habit and never forget--or at least not more than once every couple of years.
Helpful Answer (2)
Reply to LittleOrchid
Report

Short answer is yes, if this is new behavior.

How old is your husband? I think this matters if he's 55 or 85.... it makes a difference.

Has it happened in a short span of time? Or twice in a month? This also may matter.

In the end, he needs to be seen by his doctors (cardiologist and primary). THere may be other medical issues going on before you jump to the conclusion that it is a permanent cognitive decline. Often after a hospital procedure that includes anesthesia, a patient will have after-effects, some of which may be permanent. But please make sure to discount all other causes first.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to Geaton777
Report

Unfortunately, this is the beginning of a one thing after another. My dad also had Afib and was on so many meds. His Dementia became worse. My dad left the stove on, left water running, left doors unlocked, left lights on, lost his glasses, lost his wallet, lost his keys, left car running, forgot to take his meds, lost his cane and etc. My mom had to follow my dad to make sure he didn't break things too. We had to replace a bathroom sink and toilet twice.
Helpful Answer (7)
Reply to Onlychild2024
Report

This devise makes it so he can't use the stove

https://iguardfire.com/

Sorry, I just read it won't be available till the Fall. Maybe you can find something similar.
Helpful Answer (3)
Reply to JoAnn29
Report

Yes. Leaving the stove on twice, along with memory issues and hearing deficits is enough to be worried about. Do not let him cook again, period. Make whatever excuse you need to, but keep him out of the kitchen. And make an appointment with his doctor stat. Your husband needs a cognition test which is short and simple, to see where he's at right now. Discuss your concerns with his doctor privately before the appointment, that's my advice.

Best of luck to you,
Helpful Answer (13)
Reply to lealonnie1
Report

Ahh...Duh...of course you should be concerned. Or are you waiting for strike 3 before you choose to do something about it, or for him to burn your house down?
Your husband obviously now has some form of dementia, and needs to be diagnosed. And sadly folks with hearing issues are at a high risk for getting dementia along with folks with heart issues.
He should no longer be left alone, and certainly not left alone in the kitchen, as he will only continue to get worse.
So time to educate yourself more about this horrific disease, so you will better prepared for what is to come in the future.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to funkygrandma59
Report
Kartyjb Jul 10, 2025
Please be kinder in your reactions to people’s questions. What may seem obvious to you doesn’t warrant “Ahh…Duh…Of course”.
(6)
Report
See 1 more reply
It could be a concern.
It might not be anything to worry about.
When I moved in with the man I would marry 1 of his pans had odd "stain" in the bottom of the pan. I asked him about them. He had been watching a ball game and forgot he put a pan of potatoes on the stove...until he smelled them. All the water had boiled out.
Another time he left the coffee pot on all day. When I got home from work all I could smell was burned coffee.
These were both the type of thing I would call forgetful or maybe careless but nothing to worry about memory wise.
I have accidently left the oven on. Again nothing I worry about.

Has he had any other memory related issues?
Forgetting dates, appointments, forgetting how to get from one place to another? (without using GPS)

Have you mentioned your concern about his memory to him? What is his response?
Have you mentioned your concern to his doctor? This you should do.
There are tests that the doctor can do. Or refer your husband to a Neuropsychologist for testing.

If this is a concern you can trip the breaker so the stove will not work. Down side you have to reset it if you want to cook. You could have an electrician put a switch so that you can shut the stove off. Limit his use to the microwave.
Helpful Answer (4)
Reply to Grandma1954
Report
cover9339 18 hours ago
What if he accidently sets the microwave for 1 hour when the food only needed 5 minutes to heat?
(0)
Report
I would say yes. What if you're not home and he does that. It's not worth the risk of a fire,

I took all the knobs off our stove because I found my husband didn't turn the knob far enough and gas was coming from the burner with no flame.
Helpful Answer (10)
Reply to HorseGal
Report

Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter