I've had a stellar career, good life and always had my act together mentally and emotionally...until now. My mom is 89 and was diagnosed with Heart Disease, Rheumatoid Arthritis and now terminal Pulmonary Fibrosis. She lives alone and we live across the country from each other. She refuses to move to where I live, so that I can care for her. She is recovering now from months of the flu and pneumonia. Although that acute illness is gone, she remains weak and somewhat feeble from being so sick. She's at her winter house and we have to figure out how to get her back home. Her Fibrosis is terminal and the average life expectancy is 2 1/2 years for someone with this disease. She has hidden this from me for a year. Now I am trying long distance to get in home health care for her until I can get there in about 5 weeks. In the meantime, I am a mess at being told this is terminal. When my dad went 20 years ago with lung cancer, I was okay with it... not this time. I'm not sleeping, depressed and I am preoccupied and distracted thinking ahead to what is in store for her and me. I've started going into mourning and she's not even gone yet...Trying to prepare or maybe over prepare for what comes next. Trying to decide if I'm going to uproot everything here, risk my marriage and move back there to care for her myself until she passes. Guilt if I don't go and major drama if I do.... tough place to be right now!