Both of my parents are gone. My mother died at age 72 in 2007, and my father died at 73 in 2003. I feel they were much too young and that I've missed out on having the in my life during very important years. I was partly my mom's caregiver (Alzheimers) for a number of years and as for my dad, his death was sudden and he lived far away in Florida, while I was in Calif. I'm married and have one adult child. After my Father passed, his sister, my aunt and her husband needed care and had no children to help, so I went back to Florida to help them. It was exhausting but there was nobody else who could do it. After they passed away, and it was all over, I felt relieved to be back with my own family. Now years later, her sister, my last relative living, is alone; her husband passed away a few months ago. She's 85 and while I love her very much, she is probably one of the hardest people to be around. She's also in Florida and so I will have to put life on hold and make the trek. I've offered her the option to move back to the West coast with me because she is depressed, overwhelmed and doesn't have friends or children to help her. She is currently in an independent living place but is unhappy there and complains relentlessly but this is something she would do anyway, so it's hard to know what is and isn't true. I am her POA now and trying to take care of things from a distance until I get there, but I too feel overwhelmed with what is to come. I have worked professionally as a caregiver, so it isn't that I don't know this realm, but personally at age 53 am feeling worn out, isolated, lonely and that life at this stage is an endless journey through loss. To be more vulnerable than I care to here, I'm very lonely and am acutely aware of my own mortality, but more so due to a lack of connection with other real life friends. I unfortunately, do not have people to talk to, to be around or to connect with. I guess I just needed to get this out. Most people my age have more family and friends in their lives and while I don't mind being alone or even solitude, I do mind the sense that at this stage of my life there is nobody I can rely on to call "friend" in real time. My son lives in another state and has a busy life. My husband works a great deal and while we get along, we do both feel the loneliness of being connection-less. Now, with the possibility of having my aunt here, I see it as something to look forward to but for many reasons know it will not be rewarding. In other words, knowing how she is, makes it plain that my stress levels will be high because she is a difficult sort who creates stress, so much that no other family member will deal with her. Where I'm going with this, I'm not sure, but I guess I'm feeling an underlying sadness or depression coming over me. Since I'm not a very social person, though I do genuinely like people, there's always been this void in my life. Bridging gaps at this late in the game feels foreign and strange and I'm not even sure how to do it. In the past when I've tried to make or maintain friendships, it generally didn't work out.