Should we replace my Mom's dog when the time comes?

Elderly should not get a dog UNLESS someone will take the dog when they pass. I have seen too many dogs euthanized because family does not want the dog or does not like the breed that their parent had. Dogs are good companions, but they are NOT disposable. Many times the caregiver will have to take care of both, the elderly and their dog.

I agree with Jess. Only get a dog if YOU will take it in when your mom passes.

I'm with Jess and Suzie here. Chances are your Mom will know the difference, or at least feel that something has changed. I wouldn't get another unless s/he will be given a good home afterwards. ... After all, they aren't just dogs or pets. They're also family members.

Unfortunately, I would also agree with the other posters here and say no, it's not a good idea. With your mom's advancing dementia, the stress of a new dog (be it a puppy or older dog) would be too much for her to handle. Also, it would be YOU who would be eventually caring for the poor thing.

My daughter adopted an elderly large breed dog (a 10-year old Pitt Bull mix -- very friendly) from the SPCA because the elderly woman who owned him died and the family could not or would not keep her. It was such a shame as this dog is so docile and friendly -- I couldn't believe the family would just dump him at the SPCA. The old lady was the only family this dog ever had. He lived a quiet and peaceful life with her. Needless to say, the dog sat their languishing in the SPCA for 4 months becoming frightened and traumatized from other constantly barking dogs, a new/strange environment, and lack of human contact. He was probably passed over numerous times because he was a pit bull mix (there is no actual Pit bull breed -- they are actually Staffordshire terriers) and their bad reputation. He "looks" mean but he is actually a marshmallow. It took my daughter months to gain his trust but he is now a wonderful pet!

Anyway, please don't think about getting another animal for your Mom unless YOU have a plan for its ultimate care. It's not fair to her or the animal. Blessings to you.

With her advancing dementia, a week later, she may not remember him after he's gone. Wait and see.

No it would not be humane to introduce a new dog, not with your mother as its principal owner anyway. Please don't.

If you are considering getting a dog for your own family, and taking it to see your mother regularly, that wouldn't hurt the right kind of dog and it might be lovely for your mother. We have an older Staffie who is painstakingly gentle around my mother and her very elderly cat; but any intelligent and scrupulously well-behaved dog would be fine. There's no harm, btw, in her talking about Buddy as much as she likes. If she becomes distressed and is constantly searching for him, you'll need to reassure her constantly and find an explanation of where he's gone that works for her (it could be the true one, but she might find something else easier to grasp - you'll have to take it as it comes I'm afraid). Take plenty of pictures of him for now - enjoy him while he lasts!

No no no no no --- don't replace the dog. As sad as it is to lose her companion, the stressors of a new dog (especially if young) will wreak havoc on your life. Question would be: do YOU want a dog? You would have to take care of the dog because it would be unfair to the animal if it doesn't get proper care. A dog needs the right food, a lot of exercise and some training. Is this something your mom can do? Think about it… I'm so sorry. It has to be very stressful to think that your mom would be sad. I love my mother with all my heart too, and the thought of her being sad is scary for me.

Best of luck. Keep us posted…

I would say absolutely not unless you are prepared to eventually adopt the dog yourself. My mother had a miniature pinscher from rescue who eventually developed diabetes, went blind and passed away. She desperately wanted another but knew she couldn't care for it so she adopted a cat, Pixie.

When I moved to care for her for four years I thought what the heck, the dog would always have a home with me so home came Sue, a minpin x jack russell terrorist. My mother went into a NH 18 months ago and Pixie and Sue now live out in the country with me, an old black lab that came from rescue last year and 4 other cats.

If your mother misses a pet perhaps a visiting pet would make her happy. I can't take Sue to the NH as she barks/screams at wheelchairs/walkers and my old lab girl was formerly abused so she's nervous of anything new or different. Lucy is the answer! She's a little kitten recently rescued off a back road and I occasionally take her to visit. Initially so tiny and sick, she's now thriving and I bought her a harness and leash for visits as she's so lively now. Makes my mother happy.

Sibling3, I see by your profile that your Mother lives on her own.

This is a hard question.... on one hand your Mom enjoys the companionship of a dog and it sounds like she is caring for him except she is feeding him people food.... yet on the other hand, if Buddy passing on which tell me is a senior himself, would your Mom be able to control a younger dog? And if your Mom needs to go onto assistant living, would you be able to continue to care for the newer dog?

My instinct is to say no unless you could find her an old gentle dog that will be put down if he/she isn't adopted. A big question there is what you would do with a dog if your mother wasn't there to care for it. You would have to adopt the dog yourself. If you are unwilling to adopt the dog, I would say no, don't consider it.

I agree with everyone else, just wait and see how she feels after her dog passes. There are other options like therapy dogs to visit her- or it would actually be better for her to visit them, Im not sure how she would feel if the dog is in her home one minute and gone the next even with the dementia. Good luck