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My mom needs 24/7 care and it's only me and her left in the world. I can't work unless it's remotely (and most of those job postings are scams). If anyone has information that would help me, I would greatly appreciate it.

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Brooklyn77: Perhaps your mother has the funds to pay you.
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Either your mother pays for her care, or if she can not afford it, Medicaid will pay for care.
It will depend on the state you live in, and what her care needs are. She will be evaluated by a case worker to determine what exactly her care needs are, and determine her financial eligibility, and whether you are a suitable caregiver.

When we lived in Minnesota, a home caregiver did not require any special training or skills, it could be any friend or neighbor or family member chosen by the recipient. We moved to Arizona, which requires the caregiver to be employed by a home care agency, and receive training. I am employed by such an agency and complete hours of continuing education training as well as CPR/First Aid certification.

Be prepared, you may not receive enough pay to live on. It can be a humiliating, and frustrating negotiation with a case manager who will break down the recipient's care needs into quarter hour allotments, and determine she only needs 3 1/2 hours weekly. I fought for maximum hours because my husband can not be left alone, but requires 24 hour supervision. That supervision is a job!
In his case, he can not get out of bed on his own, can not stand or walk, can not safely eat solid food, can not speak well enough to communicate, can not use a telephone or even the tv remote. So, he requires my constant attention. I am fortunate to be paid the maximum 40 hours per week. That replaces the wages I would earn working outside the home. But, if your mom doesn't need much hands-on care or supervision, she may only receive very few hours a week for a paid caregiver.

Start by contacting the local medicaid office. An eligibility worker can answer your questions.
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Foamergirl Jun 12, 2025
It's nice to hear this! Through the contracted VA agency, my husband was only allotted 13 hours per week. I was gobsmacked, as he is in a similar situation as your husband. It sounds awful but I will not stay home with him, I want to continue working, as watching him choose to slowly die every day for the past six years is too difficult on me. He expects the most from me and not other caregivers, and it has affected my health. I am privately paying for care, which is hit or miss, so I do get pulled in to assist anyway.
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I live in California. If your mother qualifies for Medi-cal (California's version of medicaid), she can be eligible for In-Home-Supportive Services, which will allocate a number of hours for a caregiver who can be you.

The first step is getting her on Medi-Cal or medicaid equivalent. Its an arguous process but can be done.

I've been caring for my boyfriend for six years using this method.
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Medicaid maybe the only way you can get paid and Mom must fit the invome criteria. If Mom needs 24/7 care, you may want to place her. Medicaid will not pay you for 24/7 care. You maybe better off working and allow a NH to care for Mom.
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I have been told that Hospice provides more help than Home Health. But I have not signed up my mom so this is just an option if you really are caring for her healthcare 24/7. My mom sleeps a lot. She would be happy to stay in bed. She has a button to wear around her neck or close to the bed. We have had it setup when she lived alone to dial 911. Now she is in my house, it dials me first. It does not work away from the main unit which is plugged into a wall just like a telephone. Depending on her health, you might be able to go to work, and be on call for an emergency with her.
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JoAnn29 Jun 10, 2025
Hospice does not provide care. The family is responsible for everything. An aide may be provide 2 or 3x a week for bathing. And if your lucky, you may get enough time to run errands. Home health provided by Medicare is not a permanent fix either. Hospice is end of life care not everyone fits the criteria.
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Starting on this journey with so little information or idea I would suggest that you go see an Elder Law Attorney. There you will get together the legal papers for yours own and your mother's POAs, Advance directives, and legal agreements about shared living expenses, times when you will reassess whether living together is working, and what to do if it is not, ways in which to take funds as "shared living expenses" rather than payment as regards your mom's portion of the social security so as never to run into problems with Medicaid applications if needed in future, and etc. Get a real good options descriptions for an hour and ask for help with applications your state may have for being paid as a caregiver.

Do understand that to be responsible for an elder for 24/7 care cannot really be compensated by the government. It isn't enough to live on. If your mom has a home and eventually needs placement, her home may have eventually a lien by Medicaid for recovery of money the government put out for her care. That would mean you would be homeless, without a job history, and at an age where it is hard to find work for yourself.

There is a lot to be considered here and a lot to learn. I would go to Amazon and get books on Caregiving options. Stick around on the Forum here. Go up to the search bar and type in "Getting paid as Caregiver" and read all the times the question is asked and all the answers.

You have, unfortunately, lots of research, thinking about all of this. The best option may be that you and mom live together while she's relatively well, as roomies sharing costs together and saving for rainy days, that you work at a good job and save during that time, then that mom goes into care on Medicaid and you continue working for your own future.

I wish you the best. Lots of decisions on the horizon.
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