I'm 19 and my mom is dying. Now I have guardianship for my little brother. How can I cope and who can I talk to? I'm losing it.

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I am 19 my mother is dying she has less than three months I have a younger brother who I am now his guardian my mother has Cerebral Vasculitis and doesent know who I am when only 6 months ago she ws her normal happy bright self I have power of atorney. Everyone the doctors my brother my mothers friends think i have all the answers but i am not coping I smile on the outside but i just want to run to the other side of the planet. on top of that I am in the navy I have work commitments on top of all this. How can I cope who can i talk to because I am losing it.

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Ask the Navy for financial assistance, a leave of absence, and with alleviating some of the pain you're pretending not to feel. I know you're one self-reliant tough cookie, but there's nothing wrong with asking for help in this type of situations; particularly from people who think you have all the answers.

You're definitely a HERO in your Mom's book, and mine. So go ahead and ask for the help you need and don't allow anyone else's perception deter you from your mission soldier! Make your Mom as comfortable as she can be, all the while surrounded by her loved ones.

Semper fidelis, ED.
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This is more than someone your age should have to deal with. My heart goes out to YOU and your Mother and your brother. You sound like a very mature 19 and keep in mind you need to take care of yourself I know that is easy for me to say but it is priority to try to stay focused and well. Hospice is there for end of life situations. Medical aid is needed it seems. Government should understand and have resourses for you and your brother since he is now your dependant. I do know that POA has power during lifetime only. So anything you need do as in finacial or info about her accounts should be handled ASAP. If she has a Will make sure you have an original copy or if there is an executor other than you that they have one. I definately don't want to make money the top priority but there are alot of dishonest people out there ready to take advantage of good people so look out.Oh and be very careful of what you sign. Most caregivers find out that most other family members become useless if there is someone else dealing with caregiving and all the drama involved. Put the word out that you need help or ask for help you need. Ask them specifically for ex: have someone call hospice to get that in order. Wishing you Faith and Good Will and the Unconditional Love you need for your Mom and Brother.
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You have a very heavy burden at a very early age. I hope you find some help. There are many here who may have some steps you can take to lighten your burden. I know I don't have all the answers.

Go see your Navy Chaplain NOW. When life gives you more than you can deal with the Navy can and does help to point you in ways you may not have known existed. The Chaplain service is non-denominational and they are there to help. They can facilitate things for you with your chain of command when life is overwhelming. They know that you must have your life squared away so you feel strong serving your country. Thanks for serving!

Have you checked into Hospice? If you mother's doctor has stated she has less than 3 months perhaps that can help.

Since you are taking care of your younger sibling in place of your mother, perhaps you should consider putting mom in a facility if it is too much for you to handle yourself at home.

Make sure you tell anyone who may be able to help, even if it is a few hours a day, that you need it.

Stay strong Thomas. I'm praying for you. /hugs
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