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But getting her out of bed every day is a real chore, she is constantly saying "I don't know what I'm doing but I can't do this anymore". Can barely get her to eat. She mostly turns down even things she used to really enjoy saying she is completely full all the time. She got shingles about 3 years ago and has had constant UTIs since then. Doctors prescribe antibitotics over and over without anything ever really getting rid of the UTIs. I am running out of ideas and energy to deal with her situation.

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Have you gotten a hospice evaluation for your mother yet? It may be time to do that now if she's lost the will to live and is refusing to eat. Dementia usually does reach that point, unfortunately, and hospice seems to be the best choice to keep her comfortable.

Wishing you the best of luck with a difficult situation.
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If she is having constant UTIs and think your best course of action is to get her to a genitourologist (a urologist who specializes in women's urinary tract issues). There maybe a structural reason that needs to be addressed. Although I am not usually a big fan of specialists for folks with dementia, I think in this situation, a solution could be worth the trouble.

Alternatively, see her her regular gynecologist has any ideas.

For my mom, this was life changing; she prescribed my mom a special pro-biotic that targets the genito-urinary system (it's called RePhresh). I think my mother had maybe one UTI after that, as opposed to several a year.
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