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My grandfather is like 75 years old. He literally has bitten every hand that feeds him. He has separated from my grandmother to “live” on his own but WILL NOT divorce her because “ she won’t get anything if I die and have any income”. He makes welllll enough money to support or help with her rent and pay for his own rent and wayyy more. He even has his own eBay side business. He decides to gamble a lot of his money away or give it to my brother who does a lot of bad things and manipulates him in a way to get his way. Besides that my mother has taken him in countless times and he ends up getting kicked out because he degrades the entire family after a while. Only because he gets up set after while of her saying u need to take a shower take care of ur self or help keep his room clean. He gets upset if she asks if something is wrong or if she insists that he goes to the doctors. He gets really upset and angry for no reason. Anyways so for years Instead of getting his own place he decides to rent rooms out of peoples homes. He recently lived with me in which we didn’t charge rent, I washed his clothes cleaned his room and he came and went as he pleased . Then he decided to leave for a week on his own because he got upset because we weren’t home when we said. Then he came back to live with us and starting peeing in cups. He said he couldn’t make it in the middle of the 🌛night. But he couldn’t dispose of it the next day???? Ewww. I do what to do. He left again. And then started talking crap about me and my family when all I did was take care of him really. He never bothered us any. We never charged him rent like my mother did and all she ever did with him was argue and fight with him. I’m not even close to how my mom is. I’m upset because he literally bites the hand that feeds him and ends up with no one to take care of him. And throws it in my face saying well I took care of u when you where little and u should be taking care of me now!!!! Obviously I know this but Like idk what to do. I was fine with him here until he decided to leave on his own two times and he starting fighting with my husband and taking us for granted. I think he needs diapers because he is peeing in cups and not throwing them away. But he doesn’t want help or is afraid to ask. And he won’t help himself either.

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Your GF sound like he has lost the plot and is a huge d*ck. If your grandmother has been separated for over 12 mths help her to get the divorce. Also. Go with her so she can get things she wants from the home. Your GF does what he does because all of you let him
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Reply to PandabearAUS
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When did your grandfather separate from your grandmother?

How was he and how was their marriage up until this time?

I appreciate that you have said that "for years" he has been lodging in other people's houses; but then you also say that he has "literally" been biting hands that are prepared to feed him. Would you mind going back a bit to some actual dates and events? - then we can get a clearer picture.
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Reply to Countrymouse
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Yeesh! I think if you looked in the dictionary under “cantankerous old fart”, his picture would be there. Why do you even try to help him? Peeing in cups? OMG. Leave him be. Quit taking him in to live with you and then letting yourself be abused by him. He can’t force you to take care of him. It sounds like you’ve repaid any debt you may have had already. Just let him be and do whatever he wants. Let him get a low-rent senior apartment and some paper cups and have at it.
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Reply to Ahmijoy
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OK, you tried to help him,, for free I might add. And he pees in cups and leaves them for you to clean up?? How disrespectful!! Time to be done helping him and start helping GM!! Unless he agrees to pay you a decent amount for room and board and a housekeeper to toss the urine!!
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Reply to pamzimmrrt
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Help yourself. He has resources that he can spend on his own care. He disrupts your home. Your child comes first and needs a physically and emotionally safe environment which you don't have with grandpa there. Don't take him in again. He is not your problem
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Reply to golden23
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Your profile says he is in independent living?

I would not allow him back and tell him why. If he has funds, let him rent a motel room or an apt. He is not ur responsibility. He is not an elderly old man. He has no respect for anyone. He is a user.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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