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My father was in assisted living/memory care facility. Almost all decisions were being made on his behalf without communicating most things to the POA. The Physicians Assistant overseeing that facility was also making virtually all decisions on my dad’s behalf without my knowledge or consent. My father was requested into the clinic on a bi-weekly basis and the alternating weeks he was getting blood drawn. He became anemic, low in B12, then high in B12 he was being given intramuscular shots and my dad hated needles. The facility did not inform me of medications my dad was on, what condition(s) he was in, I didn’t even know that my father had taken a turn for the worst! I was the one who sought medical treatment for him to go to the hospital. Diagnosed with a UTI and dehydration, sent out of hospital, 9 days later ends up in 2nd hospital with renal failure (was previously put on Acyclovir 8,400 mg. On a 94 year old body in facility in July and declined from there. After entering into the 2nd hospital he had declined in hydration so bad that he could not make it. Veins too small to give hydration access. He knew he was dying and started refusing anything they wanted to give him.. ultimately passed away in hospice. I had an attorney review the paperwork (personal injury) and after looking all the documents over stated he had so much going on that there didn’t seem to be a clear path to why he ended up with a UTI, dehydration, renal failure, sepsis. Etc. Naturally, I am so angry at the facility and the Physicians Assistant. I am working through the state and I am doing affidavits so they at least know I’m telling the truth about the fact that I was not notified of most things. We lost my dad in Sept 2020. It still pains me from time to time about all he went through. I guess the attorney’s want the slam dunk cases. I want to seek justice however I can and yet the state investigators are almost useless when it comes to these serious matters. They missed the documentation from the 1st hospital re: dehydration. It only said UTI. There will be a state investigator to look into the practices of the Physicians assistant. He was acting as if my father didn’t have Alzheimer’s/dementia. I had no knowledge from the facility or the PA that dad was being taken out and having blood drawn for months and months. He documents falsely, “as per family request, he would like blood draws” that was an absolute lie because dad hated needles. Is there a support group for people who have gone through what I have gone through? I will be talking with the “disability rights of Washington” on the 10th, I don’t know what they can do for him/me. Yes, he’s gone, but this will happen to others too. Some how these people know what they can get a way with. We are the ones in the dark.

So sorry for your loss.
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Reply to NeedHelpWithMom
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I agree with the other posters. I would suggest you may want or need to get help with some counseling to help you in the grieving process.
Kidney failure is one of the major systems, as is heart and lungs. When in a man this elderly one of these systems goes down, it almost always follows that the others do like a set of dominos set on end.
I am so sorry for your loss, but it sounds to me as though your father had EXCELLENT treatment for a multitude of problems just listening to the care rendered.
We cannot win against age, and anyone who tells you there is a personal injury suit in the death of an elder 94 years of age-- well, let me just say, you can judge this by whether they are willing to take such a case on contingency (I can fill you in a bit on WHY this is true if you care, and if you want to private message me). The answer will almost certainly be no, the attorney will charge, and it will be your money. And it will sadly be a waste of your money. Worse, or your time, of your hope.
If your father was incompetent to agree to hospice at the time he went into hospice care, then who DID sign for hospice? That is important to know. And whoever DID sign for hospice, were they aware what hospice means? Because when one enters hospice there are papers that are signed. Did whomever signed for hospice understand what hospice is?
Your father was 94, and while I am not suggesting that means that his life isn't worth mourning, worth grieving the loss of. what I am suggesting is that it is to be "expected" on some level. And hopefully accepted.
I am so sorry that you are having such trouble accepting your father's death. I hope that you will seek help, will soon be able to celebrate a loving life that was long, and I would guess very full of love.
Again, I am so sorry for your grief. It is doubly hard when we cannot be there to oversee things, and so few of us can at this time. It is often hard to get hold of medical personnel. Even harder in Covid-19 times than normally it is.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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I really don't see this going anywhere. As the attorney said, there were myriad things going on with your dad, plus he was 94 years old. It'd be almost impossible to put a finger on exactly what went wrong.

Attorneys aren't necessarily looking for a slam dunk, but they are looking for an obvious malpractice and I just don't see one here. As your father's POA (I assume) you had the responsibility to stay on top of his medical care and know what they're doing for him. Were you not getting pharmacy bills for his meds? I know I get a bill every month, and right there is a list of all the medications my mother takes. If I have questions about any of those meds, I call and ask the nurse on duty about them. They call me if they're doing something out of the ordinary, such as prescribing antibiotics, but I don't get automatic updates on what her meds are. That was your job.

It's hard to accept that a loved one has died without really knowing or understanding what happened, but it doesn't mean malpractice happened.
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Reply to MJ1929
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What are you angry about, specifically? I’m not sure.

They provided complete treatment. Diligent in sending him to the hospital not once but twice.
Are you saying they took him out to get lab work every 2 weeks and you didn’t know about it? B12 shots as well? Are you angry about this?

Human bodies wear out. Often when we are elderly another bad event can lead to a cascade of body system failures. We got bits and pieces of his medical history here: UTI’s, dehydration, anemia, more dehydration, Acyclovir (an antiviral) & renal failure in your post which makes me assume your father had been ill or declining before this.

Were you the POA for your father? Were you in regular contact with his physicians while he was hospitalized? I just feel many things are missing in your post.

It sounds like even the attorney you used is confused as well. As for malpractice that will be hard to prove as treatment was provided.
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Reply to Shane1124
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Why a personal injury attorney? This sounds more like a malpractice issue.

Check AL/MC contract. It is not uncommon for the paperwork to contain language that state the facility medical staff will administer proper meds. How available were you? Did you check in with the facility regularly?
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Reply to gladimhere
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