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The most common thing he repeats is being able to use the telephone, which requires me to dial because hes either no longer able to read or no longer has the ability to press the numbers due to a stroke and loss of oxygen to ths brain. Even if i do dial the number as soon as he hangs uo with whoever he was speaking to he goes back to insisting to call them back. If I don't give in at some point he has called 911, and I had to unplug the telephone. He is able to walk around kn his own most days with a walker and after i unplug the phone he gets up and falls on purpose while I am cooking or cleaning and if that doesn't get him what he desires he then refuses to eat. I thought the television might help but he will not keep it on or watch it, i am at the end of ny rapidly fraying rope, any suggestions would be so greatly appreciated :)

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Schoen, we have all been there. We all first realized my mom was having serious problems when the repetitive phone calls began. Sometimes five times in 15 minutes. If I were you this is a battle I would not fight. Instead form your army. Tell the people he is calling that he is asking to call and call again and how hard it is for both of you, increases agitation etc. Let them know that you will let him continue to call after tye first call, instruct them to not answer the phone again. Then tell them the person must be out. I did this often when mom was sundowning. I would often tell her that I knew they were out to dinner, on vacation, whatever, and we would call them tomorrow. Or it is too late they were in bed.
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The repeating was always difficult for me. I just had to turn it off in my head and pretend. Sometimes I would pretend I was in a contest. The contest was to see how many times I could calmly respond to the same question. After I lost count, I would try to convince her to take a nap. I'm not the best person at this, though, others would say I was. No one else could tolerate it the way I could.

One thing that I resorted to, before my loved one was placed in Memory Care, is that I would take the phone away and hide it. If she asked to call someone, I would say they were not at home. I'd say they had a doctor appt and wouldn't be home for the rest of the day. I'd just keep saying that. Sometimes, I'd say the phone was out of order. I wouldn't let her have free reign with the phone.
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my aunt used to do this to my dad - her brother - and he'd get to where he just wouldn't answer after a while, either
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This is a hard one, I have learned so much patcients with this not only do I have mom with alzheimers but also a special needs step so and they both will do this. Try your beat to block it out but respond. I know its hard but my mother has told me so many times that it means so much that i listen to her same old stories. I can finish her stories which is good because I know her so well. With alzheimer's you need to be very close. Hope this helps
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Thanks you guys! I'm relatively new at this. I never even thought of pre-calling those few people that he ALWAYS wants to speak with and tell them not to answer to the many following calls. That seems so simple now that I can step back a bit and get some perspective. I really appreciate the advice ;)
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We are there right now. The team all gets these phone calls all night long, waking their spouses. The phones are now turned off overnight, but the worry doesn't stop, worry that the patient is not getting care.
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It's been years since I had children's play toys, but I do recall play telephones. If they're still available in toy departments, albeit in a play smartphone mode, perhaps getting one could help. He could make all the calls he wants but really won't get anyone. You could tell him that it appears all the circuits are down today.

When you have a few moments, you could suggest trying the landline phone. Suddenly the system is activated again. When you're ready to go back to work or other chores, you could say you need to use the landline phone and return the play phone to him.

I'm also wondering if there are phone numbers that just provide an inspirational or soothing message but aren't really answered (or the queue is too lengthy or complex to navitage) that he could call just to listen to.

If you have an extra cell phone, perhaps there's some way you could program in some soothing music; tell him to call that number - it will reach all of his friends, but instead he'll get calming music.

I've never been through this and have no personal experience, but I think the idea of pre-notification is excellent. Is this one of the typical behaviors of a form of dementia?
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We can all do that when living under the same roof with someone. It is called becoming overly dependent. Reminding the person that (in certain instances) they can answer their own questions, fostering independence without rejecting them, having them look up their own answers to spelling or math can help.
As for the stories, personally I cannot endure them over and over and don't have an answer. My husband, also with special needs, can be tactless, and tells me:
"And I need to know this because?" But that can really hurt, even though now I understand this may be the only way he has to shut me up. If I cannot listen to other's stories, they should not have to listen to mine. I am glad you are close and so kind to your mom. Can you interupt her with a hug, and say "Can we talk later mom?", then go do your work.
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Correction: Aveeno is close to Mom.
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Warning: Concluding someone is falling on purpose, or doing something for attention or because they have an undiagnosed mental illness or dementia has proven to be in error many times. For example, behaviors associated with a UTI, or refusing physical therapy and later finding a fracture are some reasons to first seeing a doctor, getting a second opinion, or have the patient seen by a geriatric neurologist or psychiatrist may help. The treatment varies with the diagnosis, there is not a one pill fits all with alzheimers or any other diagnosis. Keep trying.
You are doing well to vent your frustrations here. Keep on trying.
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