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I'm talking stress wise. Many people complain about how stressful it is to care for their loved one, but go to find out this person is in a facility with a staff. When you do it almost all alone 24/7 it's very different. Those that have their family member in a good facility should see how lucky they are that they can walk out of the door and know someone else will handle all the small problems. My mother (92) spent 8 weeks in rehab last summer, she was ok and I was free sleep the night through with out listening for her calling, someone else cooked and cleaned and kept her well, all I had to do was make sure they were doing their job. Let me tell you that's much less stressful than being the 24/7 care giver. All I'm saying is look on the good side of things. Don't just see all that you have to do,think about all that you don't have to do, because everyone here isn't that lucky.

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I cared for my dad in my home until he went into a nursing home and while the burden of day to day 24/7 caregiving was lifted I found that there was still a huge amount of stress from having my dad in a nursing home. He lost things, his clothes were stolen, he didn't get his pills on time....all these things that happened in the NH would prompt my dad to call me sometimes up to 10 times a day and well into the night when there wasn't a thing I could do about it; as his heath grew worse he became scared and weepy when I'd visit and I couldn't leave him like that so I would stay with him; then there was the business aspect of having a loved one in a nursing home. Questions about the bill, care plan meetings, documents the social worker needed. It was never ending.

I always say that the stress doesn't stop when we place our loved one in a nursing home. It just gets different.
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I totally "get" that I am fortunate that my mother is in a decent nursing home. I know that the job that hand's on caregivers do is much more difficult, and not one that I could physically take on at this point in my life.
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