Caring for Mom: Resources & Support for Caregivers
When elderly parents can no longer care for themselves, adult children often transition into the role of caring for Mom or Dad. As much as aging parents desire to remain independent, there comes a time when health or cognitive issues interfere with their ability to function without assistance and an adult child needs to step in to help.
Aging often highlights the complexities of the relationship between a mother and a child. The traditional definition of mothering is characterized by providing care, so the shift in role to becoming a care recipient is often a challenge to long-standing family dynamics.
When an elderly parent shows signs of needing assistance with activities of daily living, it’s important to consider their needs as compared to what you are willing and capable of providing. Whether providing hands-on care or making long-term care plans for Mom, there are some tough questions that should be given careful consideration.
7 Questions to ask when considering caring for Mom:
- What is the history of my relationship with Mom?
- How much care is needed?
- How much care can I personally provide; am I capable of providing hands-on day to day care, or could I best serve Mom by managing her care decisions?
- Is there anyone with whom I could share the caregiving responsibility?
- What impact will caring for Mom have on my own relationships- spouse, children and friendships?
- Where does our family stand on hiring in-home care or placing Mom in a long-term care facility?
- Does mom have the resources to pay for care; am I willing to invest my own resources?
To answer these questions and navigate through the emotional, financial and physical challenges of caring for your Mom, use AgingCare’s resources for information, advice and support. Explore articles written by experts to help plan this new stage of life and find the support of other caregivers with experience in the challenges of caring for Mom in our online Caregiver Forum. AgingCare is here to help through every step of the caregiving journey.
Planning Ahead for Mom and Dad's Elderly Care
Advance care planning can make a critical difference in the lives of your parents as they age. An elder law attorney can help your elderly parents with advance directives, wills, living trusts and power of attorney before they get sick.11 Comments
How Caregiving Can Help Us Rethink the Meaning of Motherhood
As caregivers, how much do we owe our aging mothers? Learning to appreciate those who mothered us during our formative years and finding forgiveness in our hearts for those who faltered in these duties can help us come to terms with these relationships.6 Comments
"I Love My Mom But I Don't Like Her."
We may love our parents because they are family, but that doesn't necessarily mean we like them as people. When caregiving responsibilities fall to you, how do you take care of parents who you don't like?506 Comments
Mom’s Moving In: How to Adapt Your Home for an Elderly Parent
Deciding to move your elderly parent in with you is a choice that will significantly alter life as you know it. Consider these tips for adapting your home to create a safe and successful multi-generational living arrangement.5 Comments
POA: How do I make sure I have the legal authority to make decisions on mom's behalf?
In order to make most decisions on an aging loved one's behalf, you must be given the legal power to do so. A durable power of attorney is a document your relative executes that gives you specific legal powers to act on his or her behalf.12 Comments
Memory Care: The Greatest Gift We Could Give Mom
The progression of her Alzheimer's disease over the last eight years had been pretty much textbook. Still, nothing could have prepared us for the process of putting mom in memory care.50 Comments
How can I accept that my manipulative/abusive mother (now 15 months in NH) is my responsibility as I am her POA/healthcare advocate?26 Answers
What do you do when your elderly parent is the most unhappy person you know?57 Answers
What should I do, husband gone 12+ hours a day with his mom, she refuses other care...29 Answers
I live out of state from my mom's memory care and vacant home. 4 years of flying down to manage everything has finally got to me. Advice?22 Answers
My mom has been a miserable, nasty, and hateful person all her life. As a mother she has dominated every aspect of her children's life.1,301 Comments
Moving Mom6 Comments
Not a question. Just needing support.13 Comments
And just like that, it’s over.13 Comments