Hey guys, My mother has developed early onset Alzheimer's and is in a memory care area of a nursing home. She previously had a wonderful roommate that relocated. Prior to the NH moving in someone new with my mom, I noticed a new resident that was very disruptive, constantly talking disturbing everyone at the tables and even aggravating the nurses and aides. Once I noticed this, I immediately called the social worker to ask her who would move in with my mom because I had a strong feeling it was going to be her. Well of course it was and I practically begged her to not move the woman in with my mom because I foresaw a serious problem.
Now that they went forward with moving the resident in with my mom, just as expected, she has become a great nuisance! Her new roommate is physically harassing her nightly, attempting to get in the bed with my mom, talks constantly, wakes my mother up nightly and my mother can not get any rest, demanding my mother listens and talks to her as she repeats the same three life stories, adding to her agitation! There are other residents there that would be more suitable and are in the same stage or similar as my mom they could consider. The social worker told me it's their "policy" since I'm the one complaining, that my mother has to be moved, that the other family is not the one with the "issue". With her saying this, I take it as her blaming the victim being harassed and not doing something about the harassing resident. This resident was transferred from other places with similar complaints it's rumored. I would have no problem with moving my mom to another room except, my mother has made TREMENDOUS improvement from the time she was first admitted. She knows where her room is, has adjusted very well to her room, knows where all of her things are, and flat out told me she likes her room. From what I've read, if there is progress in the behavior of a dementia patient receiving rehab/memory care, interrupting the routine can cause agitation and possibly cause my mother's progress to deplete. I expressed all of this to the social worker, but she was quite condescending and didn't seem to care. I want to be peaceable but I feel it's quite unfair my mother has to move when she is the one being harassed and I attempted to be proactive PRIOR to them moving in the other resident.
I understand they have limited space and can only do so much with the residents they have, the problem is, they have made no effort to even consider my concern! Everyone, including a couple of the nurses that see this behavior from my mothers roommate and see how it's affecting her, even my legal advisor is saying my mother has rights and it may be a good idea to file a complaint with the state since the nursing home seems ok with the harassment and ok with my mother's progression being hindered.
I'm not sure what to do. Has anyone ever had issues with roommates and it resolved in your favor? Did you contact the state, if so what were the results?
Thanks for your help in advance!