He goes in other rooms looking for me. I'm still a nervous wreck. All I do is wait for call from home. Guess I was wrong thinking I could regain my old life but that life is gone. Miss him very much- not the aggression but just his presence. Help!

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It's only been 2 WEEKS. You can't suddenly in that short amount of time reasonably expect to adjust to a new environment and I am talking about you.Also it may take him a very long time to adjust to his new surroundings,this is normal.Ask the facility where he is if there is a support group for the families of the residents there and if they don't do they know of one. You obviously have computer access, start looking for support groups for familes that loved ones with dementia(I am assuming that is why you placed him) and you are not abdoning him, you are just getting him to a place where you believe he can get better care from shifts of people. No one person can keep taking care of another with increasing physical and mental needs by themselves forever, there comes a crossroads where to continure this it would not be safe for either person. So , give yourself more time, there is no magic number,each person is different. You have already done one positive thing and that is by reaching out to people on this forum .Keep coming here, there are lots of people on her that have either just put their loved one in AL or NH or have already done so.They talk about how this has effected them,ventilate their feelings, talk about how they cope with the changes. I am so glad you came here and hope to here more from you as you start your new journey.
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Xhausted: I'm so very glad to hear from you! This is a process; you don't go back to feeling like yourself anymore than you became scared of your husband overnight. Is the home calling you to request your assistance, or just to inform you what's going on? Has he been seen by a geriatric psychiatrist and his meds adjusted to calm the agitation?

In your position, I would try to get out, go to the Mall to window shop, go to a movie, go for coffee with friends. Turn off your cell phone. He is in care, and at least theoretically, they can handle emergencies. That's WHY he is in care.

When he's become more acclimated, you can visit, advocate for his care, play cards, look at picture albums. Time heals!
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