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My mom is 81 and she had a stroke. She is in a rehab center, and she is refusing to take medication, and she will not eat at times. She is in California, we need to get her to Texas so that we can care for her. What can I do?

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You probably won't be able to take care of her at home. Stroke patients are notoriously difficult to manage. She's already refusing to take meds, and she will probably continue to refuse. She refuses to eat, and it's unlikely that you'll convince her otherwise. If she is weak, she is probably unable to stand or help with transfers to bed, car, toilet, chair. She will probably need a two-person assist. She'll need appointments with new doctors, and in Texas it can take months to get a doctor appointment. Then you have to get her there, but how? Can you get her in a car, into a wheelchair, into a building, an elevator, and doctor's office? And then reverse it to get her home? Which needs to be modified for her disabilities before she even gets there. Is she incontinent? Do you know how to keep an incontinent patient clean so she doesn't get skin infections? Then there are the mental issues, such as depression (common), anger (also common), and cognitive decline (quite common).

Getting her to Texas is a problem, but so is caring for her once you get her there. I have taken care of a relative post-stroke for two years, so I know what you are facing. I wish you luck with all of it, but please go into it with eyes open to how very difficult it will be. Start looking at some care facilities in Texas right away. You need to know your options.
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Reply to Fawnby
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Is it medically possible for her to travel such a distance? After my mother’s stroke, there was no way she would have been able to make such a trip. Have you been to visit mom at rehab for a few days to get a good idea and personal look at her level of caregiving needs and whether this will be realistically doable by you? It’s great to want to do this, the reality of it may be far different. I spent my mom’s post stroke years trying to find a way we could care for her ourselves. Sadly, it wasn’t doable at all. Be sure you fully assess the job before committing to it. You can hire medical transport at a big price or attempt to travel with her on your own. I wish you the best in planning for the situation
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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Depends On if she is Mobile - Hop a flight and when you return with her ask for the front row seat for disabled people . Let them Know you will need a wheel chair . I use jet Blue and they were very helpful . Other wise you will Have to drive back and forth .
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Reply to KNance72
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Any medical transport is going to be very, very expensive. The most affordable option is to drive there and bring her back, planning for lots of stops along the way - some people on the forum have rented an RV
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Reply to cwillie
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