There’s a lot more to the story… As it is a repeat of a previous situation, where my brother’s called the police when I was taking my dad to church and stated that I was kidnapping my father… When my mom passed away, I was told if I didn’t bring my father back home that they were going to call the police… I was taking my dad to make funeral arrangements for my mother in addition to getting his beard trimmed for my mother‘s funeral… So here we are again … it’s just my dad now, who has four caregivers… One I don’t even speak to at all one. one I barely speak to… One I speak too, but share very little information… And the head Caregiver, who I considered to be almost like a sibling… My dad recently had Covid and his memory had started to decline prior to Covid so I had discussed only in front of the one Caregiver the three items which we had previously spoke about on multiple occasions … the first being his home, the second being his puppy who was now part of his estate, and the third being my desir/wanting to facilitate my dad‘s funeral in the event of his death in addition to receiving the flag, that would be presented to a family member. Apparently the house thing got my brother all in a uproar… My gold digging brother who started sending me messages… The caregivers started saying things to me that were personal family information… Then all of the sudden everything turned to that I was scaring the caregivers they were afraid/felt threatened by me they accuse me of elder abuse, said that I was throwing items. All kinds of lies yelling at my father. Now they’ve been directed to not allow me in the house. Cops/DSS were called. One caregiver stated that she was fearful of her life… Extremely dramatic… Brought her mentally unstable daughter to work with her… Who yelled at me through the door that I was psychotic to leave … my dad didn’t want to see me and the cops have been Called. My father has been coerced by my brother and the caregivers as well to state that my dad doesnt want me there, which is extremely absurd not something my father would say… Now they’re saying that they’re going to get a trespassing order and a TRO… I’ve not been allowed to see my dad in three days. My phone calls are declined or the caregiver says she can’t hear me when I have zero issues with my phone, so thats absurd. I’ve never yelled at my dad… I am a redhead and when I get upset, I do raise my voice, especially when I’m passionate about something… Or upset… My brother has been fed lies and of course has all of my dad‘s money to afford an attorney which at the moment I’ve taken a break from travel nursing to move to an apartment 10 minutes away from my father versus the 140 mile drive round-trip I had been making to see my dad… What can I do… My father is my best friend, my hero, my biggest cheerleader, my ride or die, my Bestie Bestie, my wingman… My everything, and it is literally breaking my soul, not to be able to see or talk to him … I was recently informed that items that have been removed from the home that are part of my father‘s estate is actually illegal and my brothers have removed multiple items some items that are specifically willed to me in addition to a $21,000 coin collection… Discarded multiple items from the home into a 12 x 20 dumpster without my dad‘s knowledge and without asking me if there was anything I wanted… At the time that my mom passed… To include the night before my mother‘s funeral I was assaulted by my one brother and then twice I was assaulted by my other brother and the brother who was actually the POA has been trying to destroy me since finding out that I told my father about the abuse that I sustained from my brother as a child… The brother with the POA had molested me as a child and tried to rape me when I was 17… Which my father didn’t learn about until 2016 when I moved to Florida at his request 2 help care for my declining demented mother. What can I do to prevent this from going any further … it’s killing me
You brother has POA and seems to be very controlling. Did you call and tell him you were taking Dad to Church, getting his beard trimmed? I agree, he went a little overboard with the kidnapping thing. I think this problem between u and brothers may go back years. Seems brother is the gatekeeper and you have to do things his way. With a POA assigned, you really can't do anything.
You worrying about Dads funeral is really your brothers responsibility, he controlls the money. The Flag, that is given by the funeral director. Handed to a family member thanking the deceased for his service. A flag can be ordered for each child. If the service is held at a National or VA cemetery, there will be a representative from the military to hand the flag to a love one.
IMO, if you want to see Dad, you have to follow your brothers' rules. Your problem is not a new one. Sometimes you just have to play by the rules right or wrong.
You could see an attorney to try to get Guardianship. That could be a difficult and expensive road to go down. It would help if the APS investigation finds that your dad has been abused or neglected.
This is a lot of drama. I feel that the caregivers based on your rant have a valid reason for TRO and to not want anything to do with the drama between you and brother.
We aren't mediators and we are getting one side of this whole long story, so cannot possibly makes guesses at what IS happening and what SHOULD happen.
I think you should discuss all of this with either a good cognitive therapist or with an elder law attorney. These people will know best approach, what the legal limitations are and etc.
I sure do wish you good luck. But if bro is caregiver and POA you may soon face a lockout that would be tragic for your elder at end of life.
I have almost no sympathy with siblings that carry on in this manner at the end of parents' lives when they are at their most fragile. To be torn apart between your children in the manner is a great tragedy. When the sibling come to us it is always as the innocent injured party, and well they may be that; I couldn't know. Again, get professional help. If you need contacts for mediation I can provide them if you private message me.
Did you press charges on the brother who assaulted you before your Mother's funeral? Apparently not.
If your Father is your hero, and he now knows about the POA brother's behaviors since 2016, WHY is that brother still holding control over his money and still has POA after 9 years to change it? Especially before his recent Covid and memory decline?
You need a lawyer before you show up for that TRO Hearing.