Oh how I wish we could get mom to bathe! She hasn't showered in years and the sink baths stopped about 6 months ago. We do the laundry and we know because there isn't a towel or washcloth in sight, ever! The soap never shrinks. So far she doesn't smell, but this has to be unhealthy! To begin with, she is one of those people who never received any pleasure from a nice long warm shower, so there has never been any motivation to do more than jump in, wash a little and jump out in 2 minutes. We have tried everything short of forcefully stripping her clothes off and pushing her into the shower. She won't let anyone else into her apartment so a caregiver or therapist is not an option. She is totally unreasonable, can't be convinced no matter what we do or say. As a last resort she lies and says she washes. She may have dementia, but she is not stupid and her ability to fight back is magnified, she counters our every argument and plea. Do we just let her stay dirty? She's 99, but healthy and still mobile. Her biggest impairment is her dementia and huge sense of being independent and in control. Help! What do we do?

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