I am new here, as my parents (83 and 87) just moved across the country to be closer to me. They are residing in a condo. They are fairly independent but depend on me and my husband for rides and bills/maintenance. I think they would have benefited with assisted living, but they don't want that, so this is the first step. They know no one yet, but I am trying to see what kinds of seniors services are available. (which is more difficult because while they speak English, it is not their first language and appears to be declining as they age). Anyway, this has been in the making for a few months now, and over time, even though it is still "new", I already have a high level of resentment against my only other sibling, who can't share any of the burden because she lives in another country.
We both have young families and we both work, but I am the default caregiver due to location. She knows it's hard and feels bad, but can't do any of the day to day help. I also feel she doesn't quite "get" how much time and sacrifice it actually takes and my parents are still fairly independent! I really can't find much sympathy when she complains about the things she does help with, because it still is less that what is on my plate. I know this is very common, but how does one not let the resentment overtake them? I guess I have nowhere to direct my resentment except at her, even though logically I know it is not her fault.