My mother is almost 83 and is leaning on me very heavily. Since 2007 I have had the entire burden of responsibility for both parents. I'm third child out of four. My brother ( the eldest) died suddenly in 2007 (cardiac arrest). I was diagnosed with epilepsy early 2008, lost my driving licence and my business as a consequence. My Dad had Alzheimers at the time of Ian's death, was in a care home by that point and died in May 2010. Ian had power of attorney - I had to go to court to take Guardianship of Dad when Ian died. Older sister (C) lives in Canada (we're in UK), younger sister (A) is about 30 miles away. C does what she can considering the distance, including taking Mum to Canada for 5 weeks (back 2 weeks now). A doesn't do much, visits once or twice a month that I know of - may be more, I don't know for sure. Mum is in excellent health for an 83 year old. Slight osteoporosis, needs two hearing aids, walks with a stick now, but is otherwise healthy (as far as I know). She lives about a 15 minute walk/5 minute drive from me. I'm self employed, working from home as a dressmaker. Mum gave up on life when my brother died. She has sat in her chair for the last 8 years, reading and watching tv. She's carrying way too much weight and fights every suggestion I have that would keep her independent (walking stick and hearing aids took two years of persuasion). I've got her going to a day club one day a week. I'm in the process of organising a cleaner for her. She won't leave the house unless someone picks her up in a car from her front door. She is incredibly unfit now, and can't walk the length of herself without being out of breath. She's taken to phoning me on an almost daily basis to do small things for her that she could do herself. Today she asked me to feed her cat. She is very emotionally manipulative and I am very easily manipulated. I've got her a neck alarm, so if she falls she can press the button for help. She fell in the garden last week...neck alarm was indoors, by her bed. She sat there for an hour before a neighbour came outside for a smoke, as she couldn't get herself up. She isn't disabled, just overweight and unfit. I feel like I'm living on a knife edge. She phones constantly...get me milk (the shop is a 5 minute walk from her house, but she won't do it), I need batteries for my hearing aids (pharmacy is 5 minutes walk from her house too). I'm terrified to NOT answer the phone calls as the time I do ignore it, she'll REALLY need me but she is driving me CRAZY. I feel like I'm going mad. I'm angry. I'm fed up. I'm frustrated. I want to scream until my eyes bleed. She's making me hate her. What can I do? My husband says I need to ignore her phone calls during the day, as I'm working. My two sisters don't get called during the day, and they work from home, but they work FOR someone. I'm self employed so clearly aren't doing a "REAL job". But I don't get paid unless I'm working, unlike employed people. I'm going mad. I'm really and truly going mad. Please tell me I'm not alone in this.