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Once again FIL fell and is in nursing home until he can leave which they doubt will ever happen . They allowed mil to stay in the room with him as she has bad dementia and can not be alone. Now that we have them there the plan is to try to keep them there. Medicade is working on their behalf to get them covered. The problem is that we still do not have POA. This is one stubborn couple and they refuse help. Anyway medic aide needs financial info so my husband went into their house to look for paperwork. They have been issued a notice of intent to foreclose ( unopened) which medic aide says is actually a good thing. We found MIL bank account notice and it shows that someone has been withdrawing $200 every two to three days for the last month. The bank says they can't check to see if it's fraud unless we have POA. My husband explained the situation to his dad but he doesn't seem to care. I think he's given up on it all. How long will it take to get POA set up if they refuse to sign papers?

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I think the above three answers cover it all. Get going on it right away. When I had guardianship of my mother, I reserved one spot in my house for taking care of the paperwork related to it. It's like having a part time job, but you will get through it. We all did.
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Horsesh1t the bank can't check on it.

The bank can't disclose information to *you.* You're not asking them to. You're giving them information about unexplained activity which could involve criminal fraud or theft. Put it in writing, keep records. If it later transpires that there has been criminal activity and you can prove that you warned them of it and they did nothing, they could be liable.

Who operates your MIL's account, your FIL? Because one other thing you can do is call the bank while you're physically in the room with him so that he can give them verbal permission to discuss the account with you. It's a temporary quick fix, but it might work.
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Immediately get emergency Guardianship, no other way. They can't sign anything once they are incompetent.
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You can always call Adult Protective Services if you feel your elder parent is being exploited. They take these things very seriously. Just my 2 cents.
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I agree. See an attorney for conservatorship or guardianship. Medicaid can make someone make up any money spent. They don't really care who took it. But police reports might help.
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Thanks for the responses. It's a big fat mess, but they are safe rt now in a nursing home. They are working with us to declare her incompetent , they already did for him to make him stay there. He can't walk on his own and fell again while there. The pysch. Comes in two weeks. Once that happens they will stay permanently while we attempt to clean out there house before the foreclosure . Right now our best bet is to wait and see if the new account statement shows the withdraws have stopped - we will know it was one of them . My poor husband is so stressed by all this. What a mess they created for us. Good lesson learned- we will never leave our kids in this position .
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Thanks to all who posted answers, I learned a lot of information I can pass on to my son in case he ever has to access my money. I followed advice not to make him a joint owner of my accounts because it could affect his income tax, but to make the accounts Payable on Death (to him.)
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Banks have a policy to protect the customer privacy, it's the law. As mentioned above, you may want to go beyond POA and just go for guardianship. It sounds to me like someone has access to your loved one's account. I don't know if there's a co-owner on there, but if so there's not much that can be done except for the actual owner to put a stop to the withdrawals. If it's being done at the ATM, the owner can remove the card from her account to disable it. This will work if someone else has her card. The card can be permanently stopped and she can be issued a new one. The owner can also request the bank block or limit access to the co-owner. If she's not competent, this can still be done but I'm not sure who does it or how it's done. This can possibly be done during a guardianship proceeding to gain guardianship of the person. At some point the access to the account can be blocked until further notice. This can be hard if the co-owner is helping the owner in someway or another or if the owner is helping the co-owner or they're helping each other through coownership of the bank account. Blocking access to an account should be done carefully because you don't know whether or not the co-owner may actually be contributing to the bank account. If they both have direct deposit to the same account, having one owner blocked will most likely cause trouble for whoever blocked the account because someone's income is no longer accessible to them. The best way a bank can handle this is to remove one person from the account and move their money to a new one in the case where one of the owners will need a guardian. In some cases no one knows what's going on in the background behind closed doors. Things can happen secretly until all of a sudden it becomes open and everyone sees the result of what happened secretly. Be very careful if you go for guardianship because sometimes people who have access to not only a person but also their money can become monsters, especially if that guardian happens to be a big shot attorney, and also worse yet if they happen to be related to someone like a prosecutor or some other high ranking person. This is where it can get ugly because innocent loved ones around the person needing the guardian can suddenly be cut off when really the patient most needs them. Anytime you're dealing with a person with dementia, that's when they most need you, and cutting you off from them can actually make matters worse for the patient.  I think this was evident in the case of my foster dad. Just because they have dementia doesn't necessarily mean they don't still think and feel and even miss people close to them that they love. Being cut off from those people can cause them to react negatively and even become combative because ultimately they just don't want to be in the facility to start with. Now imagine being in a facility cut off from your loved ones and everything you know including losing your freedom. You may as well say it's very much like being in prison, and I don't blame my foster dad for becoming combative! The last time I saw him I witnessed abuse against  another patient at the hands of one of the workers. After reporting it, someone said something to his guardian and I was never allowed to see my foster dad again. I miss my dad, but I also couldn't turn a blind eye to the physical abuse I clearly saw with my own two eyes.  to make matters worse, some of the workers tried lying about me, but I had to set that straight also. Just because a facility seems nice doesn't necessarily mean there aren't bad people working there. Sometimes even the best research isn't enough because bad people are everywhere. 
There really is corruption in high places just as well as in not so high places, so be very wary of who gets custody of your loved one. The person you think someone is can become a whole different person when their true colors come out once they get guardianship and even control of their money especially if they happen to have tremendous wealth. The more wealth someone has, the meaner someone else can become once they gain full control of that wealth. 

One final thought is that sometimes a demented person can say something wrong was done when really that was never the case. As some of you know, demented people can accuse someone of stealing one know if I have to was done or a crime was committed one no crime was committed. They can say stuff and falsely accuse people of this or that when none of which ever happened, so be very careful if they account owner happens to be demented, there are often inconsistencies of accusations which means they can say stuff about people that's just not true, a form of false accusations
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It's not what caused them to loose the house. They haven't paid a mortgage on it since June 2015. My husband found the notice at the house- unopened. I don't know why it took the bank so long to file except there are lots of unsold houses in their area. The just finally got served. They have been terrible with money. It's actually a good thing they are loosing the house because now they'll have no where to go home too should they be allowed to leave to the nursing home. This has been going on for two years, she has dementia, he tries to take care of her but is physically unable. They have not let anyone in the house for 18 months. We called APS but they did nothing. She even stabbed him in the hand and after a hospital stay they did nothing to investigate. Complete failure of the system. I think the only reason social services is now paying attention is because my sister in law complained that they'd all ( APS , police, etc. been called numerous times and failed to notice no electricity in the home, empty kitchen cabinets, trash overflowing and three blocked toilets. After the complaint we seem to finally be getting somewhere. We wouldn't have known anything about their living condition if my husband hadn't managed to find a way inside while they are away. I think we win the stubborn parents award.
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At the risk of sounding shady here I have on rare occasion assumed my mother's persona to get something accomplished on her behalf. I have her social security information, all the answers to the standard questions. I have used it calling her billers when she was behind and they wouldn't talk to me because of privacy issues. She was in the hospital and I was at wits end on how to get the balances due on her accounts. So, for a quick fix I played her and got the job done. Now that said, if you can pull it off get the account debit/ATM card reported as stolen and reissued with a different number. When they get out and home again take them to get it re-activated with a new pass code.
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