polarbear that's basically what I have to do at times. After 2 ambulance trips to the hospital in less than a year I told the senior if you knew what you were doing you would not have had to go the hospital ER instead walking into your own doctor's office. I think it's about control as much as anything. Part of the issue is that they are from a generation that relied a doctor, pill or procedure for everything and didn't have to pay attention their daily routine including diet, nutrition etc.
I can't get the senior here to take vitamins for which he was prescribed(over the counter strength vitamins). It's a form of control and they rationalize by with it being their health-which it is but they should not be complaining about their issues then. Nor complain about the bills, doctors office waiting rooms, home care barking about privacy etc.
Tell her it's her choice to not take meds, eat, or follow doctor's orders. When she becomes sick and frail enough, she will be put in a nursing home where the nurses will fuss over her all day.
When I was caring for Mom at home, she would take whatever attention she could get. She would crave unhealthy food (she is obese and diabetic), so she would "urgently" call other people (who are not caregivers & didn't know her diet) and would convince them that I was not allowing her to eat & those people would bring her fast food - which she was not allowed to have. She would make frivolous calls to emergency services when she was alone in order to get attention. It's a little disconcerting when the 911 responders know your family member by name. That's how often she called them. When her child from out of town came in to supervise her for a weekend, she decided to develop "symptoms" which led her child to call 911 and have her picked up. She would call the pharmacy to renew scripts which she was no longer supposed to be taking & then I had to straighten all that out. She would seek attention by trying to make financial transactions that she was no longer competent to make on her own & then I'd have to straighten it all out. She would not do her prescribed restorative exercises & then would play the "oh poor me, no one understands" routine as she got progressively weaker and had continued falls. She never lost her desire for drama and the "me, me, me" - when she should have been working REALLY hard trying to stay independent. she's now in a nursing home, but constantly claims she can "go to an apartment" any time she wishes. Yeah, right. This isn't a dress rehearsal - this is reality. Sorry if she didn't understand that while she was still in her own home & not yet in a nursing home. She should have been making things work while the option was still there.
Hi Rocki No. I have not had that experience. I have had and known elders to not take meds but not to get attention. Most people do not want to go to the hospital...for any reason. But if your mom is doing this I would suspect cognitive decline and consider the suggestion to get her the proper testing. I’m sure you wouldn’t want to be doubting her if you found she had psychiatric issues although I do understand how trying it can be. Perhaps she feels something is wrong and is doing all she knows to get help for it, not realizing that it’s a mental condition ( if it is) or how to help herself. It’s hard for us to realize that if our joints are achy or her skin is wrinkled or maybe we have gallbladder or heart issues that we can also have something wrong with our brains. The brain can work most of the time like our achy joints can work most of the time but be impaired just enough to not be able to think properly or reason out that the course of action to skip meds and go to the hospital is faulty. Maybe one way to assess this a bit for yourself is to think back on her previous actions. Has she always wanted more attention than others. Has she always wanted to go to the hospital? Has she always refused needed medication?
I can't get the senior here to take vitamins for which he was prescribed(over the counter strength vitamins). It's a form of control and they rationalize by with it being their health-which it is but they should not be complaining about their issues then. Nor complain about the bills, doctors office waiting rooms, home care barking about privacy etc.
Tell her it's her choice to not take meds, eat, or follow doctor's orders. When she becomes sick and frail enough, she will be put in a nursing home where the nurses will fuss over her all day.
No. I have not had that experience. I have had and known elders to not take meds but not to get attention. Most people do not want to go to the hospital...for any reason.
But if your mom is doing this I would suspect cognitive decline and consider the suggestion to get her the proper testing. I’m sure you wouldn’t want to be doubting her if you found she had psychiatric issues although I do understand how trying it can be.
Perhaps she feels something is wrong and is doing all she knows to get help for it, not realizing that it’s a mental condition ( if it is) or how to help herself.
It’s hard for us to realize that if our joints are achy or her skin is wrinkled or maybe we have gallbladder or heart issues that we can also have something wrong with our brains. The brain can work most of the time like our achy joints can work most of the time but be impaired just enough to not be able to think properly or reason out that the course of action to skip meds and go to the hospital is faulty.
Maybe one way to assess this a bit for yourself is to think back on her previous actions. Has she always wanted more attention than others. Has she always wanted to go to the hospital? Has she always refused needed medication?
Have you asked for a psychiatric evaluation?