I am struggling and could deal with some advice please from people who have been through the same thing. My dad has mental health issues that have never been treated (see above). Growing up with him was stressful and I think his eccentric behaviour, constant lies, mood swings, cruel remarks, put downs, debt etc have definitely left their mark on my sister and me. Now we are older He has never gone out of his way to visit us or keep in touch. I see him once a year and it is strained and I am relieved to get away. My issue is that he is now elderly and ill in hospital. His neighbors contacted me with the expectation that I and my sister should be caring for him. They do not know about how he can really be as keeps up an act of a 'sweet old man' we know that this isn't the case. He also moved almost 4 hours away and I gave mobility problems and it is a huge effort to physically get there. For a long time I feel huge anger towards my dad for everything he has said and done over the years. A part of me also feels sorry for him that he is now elderly and suffering. How do I cope with this? I am struggling and have issues of my own which I believe are because of my difficult childhood. I would be grateful for any advice from anyone who has been through a similar thing. Many thanks.