I live in Mexico with my significant other and here, families tend to live together unlike in the state's where every sibling has their own house. We've been living together for almost a year with his family (aunts/uncles) occupying the back section of the property. Now my SO has a grandmother who is suffering from cancer. Before, she was staying here in our section of the house to be with the family, while we were living elsewhere. They moved her to be with her son and she was there for about 6 or 7 months. This is when my SO decided to come back home and we moved in the house together. About a week ago, the uncle, I guess, got tired of taking care of her and without communication, without saying anything to us or the other members of the family, left the grandmother here in the house on the floor, without her bed, without her things, uncovered, just left her there. We were not here at the time, and the aunt's heard her screaming and crying, and of course entered the house to see what was going on and found her laying there unattended and crying. Now this was very stressful.for us. Especially the fact that there was no communication about what was going on. but there is another dynamic that for me hurts. His family expects us, or more especially me, to do all the tending and all the caregiving. Now, we are the youngest, being in our 20s, and the most poor of the family, both of us out of work for a period of this time, and third, the daughter live here! 10 steps away and there are 3 of them! They have expressed multiple times that I should be the one providing care all day and we are the ones that need to provide food when sometimes we don't even have any for ourselves! my SO insists that it is not my responsibility, and doesn't want me to tend to her demands, for she is quite demanding. We gave her our bed, our house, we moved into the kitchen and are sleeping on the floor, we alway have something prepared for her, even if its just rice and beans. I.guess my question here is of ethics. I am an in law, living in the same house as an elderly person with needs. Obviously, the direct family isn't able, or refuses to help. I mean, they do provide but it is the bare minimum of their time...and here I am pretty much all.day in the house with her and I feel I could sit with her or bring her food, or be human with her, but I did not know her before, this is the first meeting, I am not a direct sibling, my partner has expressed multiple times that I am not to provide service, yet I cook and prepare something for her everyday, indirectly. Is that ok? Am I a bad person to be here so close and yet not provide anything? Or if she is calling for something or Someone and no one hears her but I because the others don't listen? when my partner is at work and she yells for him do I respond? Am I immoral? What is the best thing I can do in this situation? My partner and I have discused contracting a nurse to help, but we are unable to pay for these services ourselves and must be a decision made by the family was a whole. Any sugguestions?