Feeling sick and tired.
Hi there again....just needed to pass by.
Today i had a pain. It was my left eye ball. I dk if any of yall have ever felt the same. Could be allergies. Anyway bc of the pain it made my head hurt which brought on some upset stomach. So i couldnt keep food in stomach. I care for my 59 yr old mother who needs eye drops twice a day and insulin shots which i administer to her daily. I also take her to work twice a week and run her around so she can do her errands or get out of the house. Anyway....i texted her to let her know i wasnt well. Well do yall think she said , no dont come over ...stay home and rest....of course not. So i went over to do my daily tasks. She then proceeds to tell me not to worry about going early tomorrow bc she was gonna walk to clinic. So i have previously taken in seriously some advice i have gotten from this site. Which was to fight for my own life and if i nee d to distance myself feom her negativity to do so. So, witb that said i had a moment after mom said she would walk to clinc...i thought ok no maybe i should offer to take her bc i.mean how she gonna walk there...she needs blood draw ln for a coming up doc visit. Then i thought about my friends advice on here and i just kind of ignored her and sai ok then i will see u tomorrow, bye. She didnt like it she didnt get up to say bye or open door as she may usually do. I hate her negative attitude which i have thought i wonder if she has eraly stages of dementia. Then later as i get to my house i talk to my sis who lives in another city, going to school. She tells me that sometimes bc she not here it hard for her to not side with my mom. Like she made me think i guess she thinks it is easy to put up with mom everyday and i am in the wrong. Im like if she thinks that then y dont she take her with her. I dk guys but i plan on starting school in aug and to hell with everythinh with my mom....im tired of being obligated to see her everyday. It isnt a joyful moment when i do see her. I am make a better future for myself, my husband☺ nd my 7yr old son. I don't think I owe her my youth and life. Especially if I am the only one doing anything and she expects it of me bc I am the sober one, the one who lives close to her, and the one who will still talk to her. Unlike my older sis who totally has not shown herself for about 15 yrs now. I wonder why hahah...well now i know