Follow
Share

Hi all,


Has anyone experienced extreme anxiety or panic attacks when dealing with your LOs health issues? I'm starting to feel panicked about this like I'm not qualified or I'll do something wrong, etc. even though I've been caring for elderly LOs for almost 10 years.


If you've experienced this, what do you do to alleviate it?


Thank you!

This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
I am having panic attacks and/or constant anxiety because I am having some medical testing done on Monday. Probably not serious, but a small chance it's cancer. If you are a praying person, please pray for me. I'm driving myself crazy, because I can't stop worrying.
Helpful Answer (9)
Report
Midkid58 Jun 2021
Been there, done that. Worrying doesn't help, but telling someone not to worry is pointless. I will pray for you to have the strength to handle what comes your way. (I had cancer in 2019, so I know that anxiety...)
(5)
Report
See 4 more replies
My mother is bedridden in a hospital bed. I live on a farm with vegetable & flower gardens & over 50 animals. Nobody else is here, it’s all my responsibility. I never look at the overall picture. People wonder how I do it. They want other people to help. Nobody helps. My brother lives across the country & visits briefly once a year. Here’s my advice: think in categories & let yourself rest a lot. Get a wireless camera in your mom’s room so you can use your phone to check on her from your room at night or if you’re outside. After a rain, like today, I weed the gardens. When I’m taking care of the animals I have created an efficient system to meet all their needs within 20 min, twice a day. Some days, I organize, dust & clean…other days I do nothing. My mother’s needs always come first. I buy ensure powder canisters & make big pitchers of it for easy refills. She has favorite foods that I keep on hand. She has dementia & can’t express needs. By breaking things down into compartments, and what I “feel like doing”, any daily accomplishment adds up & you can complete quite a bit overall this way. But never look at it as a whole or it seems insurmountable. Small things add up!
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

My husband suffered panic attacks that would force him into the emergency room. Doctors were no help. We finally noticed that when he had a buildup of MSG (monosodium agglutinate -- a food additive, common in many packaged foods and Chinese dishes), the attacks would occur. When we monitored his diet and he avoided packaged foods, the panic attacks went away..
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

You are probably experiencing panic attacks as a result of ptsd from having so many traumatic experiences with your LO. I had the same. The brain learns the response and continues to react even when there is no danger present.

I continue to do the meditations on calm.com, there are “emergency calm” meditations for 3, 5 and 10 minutes. You can get a free 7 day trial. I also now see a therapist. It’s taken about a year but I can sleep better and don’t have the scary panic I used to.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

I’ve been on meds for anxiety for years. They also helped when I was caring for my mother during Covid. Also trying not to look past the window of the day I was in helped. Talking to a friend on the phone occasionally helped. Having my big fluffy collie close by also helped. I was in another state at my mom’s house for almost three months caring for her. I was so isolated. She’s now in memory care. I can’t imagine going through what so many in this forum are dealing with. My issues seem small compared to so many. Sending lots of love and prayers to all.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report
gdaughter Jun 2021
The benefit of this forum and support groups is that so often hearing of others issues you come away with a sense of relief knowing at least you don't have to deal with "that". ALso great idea re a pup for comfort/support. Great distraction and source of love and comfort. ANd does good for someone else!
(1)
Report
At one time I was so overburdened that when I would wake during the night, I would be compelled to get up and walk. I would go all over my house. Sit in one room a few minutes then go to another room and do the same. It was exhausting.
One night before bed, I was taking a deep soak and happened to pick up an old Oprah magazine that had an article by Martha Beck. She said that when these feelings came, to ride them out, knowing they would pass. Just sit through it. Don’t run. Something about the way she described just how I felt and just what to do resonated. So I tried it and it worked. I knew if I just waited a bit, it would pass and I could go back to sleep. That was many years ago. Now when I wake In the night I notice I have a nauseated and breathless feeling. Very yuck. I remind myself of anxiety and know that this will leave if I release it. So that’s part of it, to recognize that uh oh, Here it comes. I don’t have to be afraid. I just wait for it to pass. To dissipate. To not go chasing after it.
Google Martha Beck on panic attacks or caregiving or anxiety and there were many links. If you aren’t familiar with Martha, check her out.
Helpful Answer (6)
Report

Yes I know what you are talking about. I decided to see a therapist and I think that was a good choice.
I also started yoga and trying to go back to my routine. What is happening with mum + the pandemic certainly took a toll on me. I try to go to the office as often as I can and I avoid working for home. Staying at home the whole day working and taking care of my mum who has been completely bedridden for 6 weeks made me feel I was trapped and that I never would have my life... And the death of 2 friends last year made me think I risk to pass before my mum...
Try to breath deeply and slowly.
I have also read some psychology books on assertiveness.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

You can work to recondition yourself to relax that "fight or flight" feeling, but it takes time and commitment. Focus on slow, deep breaths. Focus on 5-10 things around you that are OK, true, peace-giving, loving kind... (I like Philippians 4:8 as a guide). Create a confidence list of how you are competently managing your loved one's care. Read through it slowly and deliberately when those panicky feelings and thoughts emerge. If these do not help, please commit to meeting with a counsellor weekly to work through this issue. Consider consulting a psychiatrist to get a prescription for an anti-anxiety medication while you are meeting with a counsellor. Medications help deal with the symptoms while you make life changes.

Just a thought: is your loved one anxious. controlling, or having a lot of negative behavior? If so, you might be picking up on their anxiety which makes you anxious. They may need their anxiety treated by their doctor with anti-anxiety medication.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

Hi ExhaustedOne,

I suffered from panic attacks since I was a little girl so I basically lived with them all my life. When I was in my 20's I went to a group therapy class designed for phobias and panic attacks which met once a week for 3 months. I did all the homework they assigned and when the class ended I was no better. Long story short the doctor that ran the group put me on medication which helped me.

Some people are just born with low serotonin which runs in all the females in my family. My Mom suffered from anxiety and panic attacks as well as my older sister.

On the other side of the coin panic attacks can be caused from stress and certain triggers such as caregiving.

Besides medication if I'm stressed I write down all my feelings on paper and that helps me. It's like purging all my anxiety and transferring it to paper.

I have also done yoga which really helps. If it's difficult to get out to take a yoga class you can do it at home in front of your TV. You can first try it out by watching youtube video's and if it helps you can buy a cd.

Exercise also helps gets rid of anxiety and raises one's serotonin levels. I love Leslie Sansone's Walk Away The Pounds cd's. I feel so relaxed after doing 1 or 2 miles of aerobic walking in front of my TV.

I hope you feel better,
Jenna
Helpful Answer (5)
Report
gdaughter Jun 2021
great CD from Cleveland CLinic yoga expert Judi Bar....
(1)
Report
My mother (just recently passed) and I were at Cracker Barrel for lunch one afternoon when I started to have a panic attack and it was because I realized with her dementia and failing health, I probably would not have her for very much longer. A lot of days she did not know me and the stress of this terrible disease was getting the best of me. I started taking Saffron capsules everyday, in fact, 4 per day, to stop the panic and anxiety and it worked. I could get through the day and my nerves were not shot. Try it, it saved me. Sadly she passed 2 months ago from a terrible fall and now I'm taking 2 per day and that's probably where I will stay since I am now dealing with my dad's sadness and trying to keep him busy. Good luck to you.
Helpful Answer (5)
Report

See All Answers
This question has been closed for answers. Ask a New Question.
Ask a Question
Subscribe to
Our Newsletter