Mom sleeps most of the time -but is that for the best?
My mom is in her mid-70s, a life-long sufferer of poor mental health (bipolar), and a martyr to arthritis. She can barely move; she's had some bad falls and despite extensive physical therapy, avoids walking and movement in general. She lives in another state, in subsidized housing. Moving her here isn't practical; we live in a 3rd floor apartment and senior subsidized housing waitlists are eternal here. I've offered to hire someone to come in and help with housekeeping and laundry, but she always says no, or not yet. She doesn't want us to spend money on her because we're putting a child through college and recovering from some pretty difficult life events ourselves. She is on antidepressants, thyroid medication, blood pressure medication, and OTC pain medications. She is fond of her doctor, but doesn't wish to discuss her excessive sleeping with him 'yet.' So here's the question: given that she hasn't been happy in years, and given the fact that she is in constant, intransigent pain -- how interventionist should I be? She is (presumably) not in pain when she's sleeping. She is in pain when she's awake, both physically and psychologically. How wrong is it for me to be OK with her sleeping so much? I just want her to be safe and comfortable and at peace. Her torment is my torment.