I am a disabled veteran with 2 babies, some financial issues and recently watched my own mother and father-in-law die horribly from cancer and pneumonia. My mother-in-law is coming to stay with us in a day or two for in-home hospice because she can't qualify for Medicaid.
She had advance lung disease with only one lung remaining. I'm expected to care for her until she dies, with no support.
She is incontinent, suffers from dementia, and often says mean things to me because she can't remember who I am. She is bedridden except apparently at night when her dementia hits and she wanders around at 2 am moving my steak knives and putting paper in my dishwasher.
I love her very much and she is a very important person to me. It is extremely painful watching her waste away and slowly dying. If we don't take her in and care for her 24/7, she will die, and in a very painful and traumatic way. With proper care and medication she will have a significant improvement on her quality of life and she will be able to die with dignity and without pain, possibly many more months from now. She doesn't qualify for Medicaid so please don't give me advice about how wonderful it is etc.
Everything is through Medicare and our pocket. I will have no relief with my children or with her care. (Please don't advice me to put my kids in daycare etc because it costs $4,000 in my area for a cheap daycare and as I stated before we have some financial issues)
Is there anyone out there in the world-wide web that knows what I can do to get help because I don't know if I can do this alone.
(Ps. We are her only family and have no other relatives to help us with either her or our children. My husband is still in the military and will not be able to help. Cannot claim her as a dependant on Tricare...we tried.)