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First I’ll give an example or two, then give some information about me to hopefully assist in solving the mystery!


Example 1: I was sitting watching tv then got up and asked my husband if he was hungry and asked what he’d like to eat. After getting the answers I made him some Alfredo. I handed him the Alfredo and he asked me why I made him food and told me he wasn’t hungry. I explained I had asked him and he told me that never happened.


Example 2: my step son wanted to go home but we didn’t have gas to take him so I asked my roommate if we could borrow her car. After she said yes I went back to ask if my husband had gotten ahold of the birth mother to verify if we could take him home and he told me we could. I went and got the keys to the car and got my step son all dressed up to leave then when I told my husband we were ready to go he told me he still was waiting on a response from the birth mother. Just like the first example, we argued back and forth about it but ultimately he never told me these things.


The problem is not in my memories, it’s in my day to day life. I can recall memories correctly, I just have no idea anymore if what I just saw or heard actually happened. It’s like I’m watching an illusion and reacting to it as though it is really happening or there. This also doesn’t happen a lot as far as I know, only once every couple months I will catch this happening.


I am a 26 year old female. I have been diagnosed with moderate to severe depression and anxiety and I am prediabetic and have PCOS. I am a smoker, and have been for 9years now. In these situations I was not drinking or on any drugs. I drink alcohol very seldom and am completely drug free. Feel free to ask me for more information about my self, but this is all I can think of that is relative.


If you have any knowledge of what could be causing this please let me know, I am honestly terrified I have early onset Alzheimer’s or something of the sort and plan to see a doctor about this, but was hoping to do some research first about other possibilities of what is going on with my head.

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Kaycee,

I would urge you to see whoever prescribed you meds for depression and anxiety. Stopping your meds without a Doctors guidance is not a good idea and can make matters worse.

Stress can cause all types of strange happenings, mentally and physically.

We are not health care providers. Just past or current caregivers for family members. We have experienced high levels of stress that caused us terrible problems. Some of us have cared for loved ones with Dementia.

My mother had Dementia along with a Depressive Disorder. There was a short span of time that the Psychiatrist treating my Mom suspected she had Pseudo Dementia caused by her Depressive Disorder. Pseudo Dementia was ruled out pretty quickly and I didn’t have time to learn much about Pseudo Dementia.

We aren’t professionals. Just regular folks, except for one poster that identified themselves as a professional.

I would suggest getting yourself back to your Dr quickly. You shouldn’t be struggling with whatever this is without the help of a Dr.

You also have to take into consideration the child that is in your care.
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Do you experience these differences in recall of events with anyone else besides your husband?

For example - did your roommate verify that you had asked if you might borrow her car and that she had agreed?
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AlvaDeer Aug 3, 2019
When anxiety flips either me or my daughter out this much we apparently not only respond but respond fully in some sort of blank fog state. At first I thought I WAS being gaslighted by the hubby, hee hee. I know now that I do it and have heard myself respond "un huh" when I hadn't listened. So am catching myself at it. And it is always in times of stress and high anxiety.
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Nope, on the Alzheimer's I think. This sounds like ANXIETY, something you are already diagnosed with. You will have a mind so scrambled and preoccupied and "busy" that you won't hear what is said EVEN WHEN YOU ARE THE ONE who asked the question. It can make you feel as though someone is "gaslighting" you. Beginning Alzheimer's is more of a putting the wrong thing in the refrig or cabinet, such as butter in dish cabinet and dish in refrigerator, leaving on stove, etc. But there are many many types of dementia, and they all act different, Frontal Temporal different from Lewy's different from Alzheimer's.
Of course this is NO place for diagnosis, and you need to check this out with your own doctor. Make a diary over a month's time that has any questionable things you hear, don't hear, see, think is wrong. Take that diary with you. They may well order a scan, an MRI or an EEG. This would be a great relief to you to have cleared. And anxiety disorder runs in my family, sounds just like it. You can become so forgetful you think your head isn't on your shoulder and you will absorb answers the wrong way and swear by them. You first thing you need to do is keep a diary. Include above and anything else you can thing of. Then off to the doc. Wishing you luck. Please update us. PLEASE. After you see your doc. We so seldom here how things worked out for folks.
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GardenArtist Aug 3, 2019
Your comment on "zenning" out of your mind is I think exactly what photos and refocusing do!  

And if the redirection is something that can involve potential activity, so much the better.    This is one reason I love the gardening magazines.   I rarely get past the first few pages before getting out my legal pad, ruler and color pencils and start creating new designs! 

That stimulation redirects and relaxes.
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This is a comment to Screennamed's post and suggestion of imaging.    I've found this extremely helpful, either visualizing or looking at photos in magazines.    For me, it's gardening magazines, or Victoria.   One of the recent issues featured France, with so many lovely photos of French shops, homes, castles, landscapes, and even Marie Antoinette's Folly.

I can feel myself relax when I see such magnificent photos.

Ninjakaycee, perhaps you could have a "go to" magazine for quick relaxation when you're stressed, and see if/how it helps.

I also have vases of artificial flowers; sometimes just glancing at them creates relaxation.  (This did help during the caregiving years, and is even more powerful now.)
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AlvaDeer Aug 3, 2019
I love solitaire and sudoku puzzles. Books, gardens. Something to just zen out my mind, and give it rest.
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To clarify, you’ve been diagnosed with depression, prescribed medication for mental problems and you...have taken yourself off the medication that you were prescribed? Do you think that *might* be contributing to your memory deficit?

We can’t diagnose here and your symptoms can be many things.

Yes, stress can cause forgetfulness. Most recently I lost a brother unexpectedly & I can honestly say that I had a few episodes of zero recall in situations I am quite familiar with- ie driving around his town (which I know pretty well) I missed streets I knew and could not remember what someone had just told me the day before.

It sounds like your symptoms may be stress related as well. We aren’t professionals so I advise a visit to your PCP or mental health provider and discuss symptoms with them.
If you’ve been prescribed medications & stopped taking them, give them another try as sometimes it takes awhile for your body to adjust & reach a therapeutic level.
If you were prescribed meds and abruptly discontinued them, this may be a factor as well, because some medications need to be gradually decreased before being completely discontinued.

I too am leading towards stress as a possible reason for your forgetfulness.
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Ninjakaycee Aug 4, 2019
I understand the concerns on taking myself off meds. I did gradually decrease them, but the reason I ultimately decided I couldn’t take them after being on them for over a year was because I started having suicidal thoughts. I’ve been off the meds for almost a full year now and am actually doing a lot better with my depression since.
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I would go to a medical Doctor first just to rule out any underling problems that could be causing your symptoms. Then consult with your doctor on treatments. You should do this ASAP (AS SOON AS POSIBLE).
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This will be a solutions focused post:
Psychological ABUSE is a possibility. Your husband might be the source of your problem: it's called gaslighting after a movie from way back in the black and white film days.

As a counselor, I've had too many clients in your situation, with husbands/spouses who either conveniently forget things or who pretend to forget things or pretend that things never happened, which extends to the outside world in strange ways.

It usually starts with little things, such as car keys getting lost and appearing in places, you would never set them., subsequently it escalates into the spouse claiming things never happened. In your examples 3rd parties are involved which means the third party will support the correct version.

SOLUTION-- Pretend to RECORD every conversation when he tells you that something didn't happen immediately tell your husband that you've recorded the conversation when he claims that you aren't remembering things correctly. Recordings, will inspire psychologically manipulative spouses to remember everything.usually they don't ask for the recording, if he does, that's your sign to purchase recording devices online, which are small devices, or use your phone

You mentioned that it only has happened twice. It's going to increase in frequency.
If it continues, get out of that situation because he's telling everyone that you're mentally unstable. If he's connected to anyone at work, it will start happening there also, tag teaming is quite common in the world of psychologically abusive people. They will collaboratively work to fcuk with you.

__________________
Neurologist consultation might be needed; which should lead to a CT and/or MRI
Reasons are countless my favorite example =if you're taking birth control, a blood clot in the brain might produce similar symptoms.
Don't be alarmed, but don't wait please.
Otherwise I'll repeat the non-patient standard and label it as overloaded-stress, which equates you needing to vacate that situation, but that = too dismissive. Imaging is always my recommended diagnostic approach to anything related to cognitive concerns.
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Ninjakaycee Aug 3, 2019
I can promise my husband is not the problem. There have been more instances, but the ones with my husband are the most rememberable cause they have happened most recently. This was going on since before me and him were together. In addition, he would never attack me physically or mentally. He is one of the sweetest, extremely mild tempered, supportive people I have ever met. When I said we argue it is not a screaming match. It is us discussing what was reality. He also doesn’t know anyone that I work with, so they couldn’t be collaborating. Also, I’ve been with this man for 6 years and we have never so much as raised our voices at each other. We have a healthy way of arguing and solving problems. Thank you for your concern though!
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Ninjakaycee, you might want to read this post:

https://www.agingcare.com/questions/i-have-a-concernquestion-about-me-450841.htm?orderby=recent

That poster addresses a similar question, different situations, but the underlying issues are similar.    And I'll share  a bit of my own experiences, and why I think this can happen to anyone caring for someone.  

W/o going into a lot of detail, I've had memory problems, concentration problems, and a lot more, including being so unfocused that I accidentally put my hands on hot pots and got small burns.   

There was just too much going on in my life when I was caring for my father.  Too much unrelieved stress.  Toward the end, I became overwhelmed. 

But the biggest issue was that there was no solution.    I felt guilty if I took more time for myself; he needed me and relied on me, so I just tried to cope.   Good options just weren't available.   And perhaps that's one of the biggest contributors to emotional stress and confusion.

After his death, it took a whole year before I could even begin to work on estate management.    And when that becomes overwhelming, the same symptoms reappear.

I also had back aches, which have all but disappeared as life calms down.    It's easy to tell when I'm worrying again b/c I can't focus.   Yet when I set things aside and relax, I'm almost normal again.

I call it caregiver isostatic rebound.    Isostatic rebound refers to ground recovery after the last Ice Age ended, as ground very slowly recovers from being compressed by heavy ice.   As caregivers, we're "compressed" or rather, weighted down, by stress, emotional and physical stress. 

You may have some physical issues, but they might also arise from the stress.   The only way to really tell is to control the stress and see how your life and assessment change.   But as caregivers, we know that it's difficult to control that stress.  

If I had to do it all over again, I would have forced myself into down time, on a daily basis, and spent more time cultivating relaxation.  

I hope this helps you.   Please feel free to ask any questions if you wish.
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Ninjakaycee Aug 3, 2019
So in your opinion, it’s just stress?
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DH- means Dear Husband
Have you been taking medication for your depression? If so, have you started taking a new one? Could it be that this may be a side effect of your meds?
I know stress can mess with a person. Have you seen a Dr. about this?
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Ninjakaycee Aug 3, 2019
These have been going on for a few years, but have been happening more often lately. I’ve completely taken myself off of all medications due to the affects I have had.
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Do these occurrences happen only with DH? Or other situations and people?
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Ninjakaycee Aug 3, 2019
I’m not sure what DH is, but I’ve noticed it at work and at home. I don’t usually notice these things on my own, it’s someone telling me that didn’t happen. But there are situations like today I was at work alone and went to start an order only to realize 5 minutes later that order was never there. I searched everywhere I could for it, but it just was not anywhere, not even in the garbage. I went to my break almost in tears because I couldn’t understand what happened.
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