I’ve told my story in a number of posts. I condensed it below so no one has to piece it together from scratch.
I come from a very dysfunctional family - narcissistic mom (diagnosed with borderline personality disorder), narcissistic older brother, enabler dad. I left home at 18 hoping never to see these horrible people again. I had a long term marriage to an abusive man who cut me off from having friends. I left him 5 years ago and filed for divorce. He stalked & harassed me. I left my place to hide at my parents. (I was in low contact with them the last 5 years of my marriage.)
To my relief he passed away 8 months after the divorce. Didn’t have to look over my shoulder every time I left the house any longer.
Unfortunately, I was distraught (PTSD) by my ex-husband’s behavior and not thinking straight. I stayed on as a caregiver to my parents who had begun to have extended hospital stays (A Fib, viral pneumonia, broken shoulder and hip). They did improve where they didn’t need me ft and then didn’t need me pt. Their physical health was ok. The mental cruelty was still there and very strong. They demanded I sell my home and move in full time with them. I told my dad I wanted to have friends and date. He told me he and my mom should be all I needed for a social life. The last straw was being cut out of being part owner of valuable family land because I refused their demands. I left for good in June 2020. The PTSD I had from my marriage was deepened from being with my mom, dad and brother. Could be my imagination, but felt they thought I’d be an easy mark to take advantage of since I put up with an abusive marriage for so long.
I feel much improved these days. I want to have friends & date. There’s COVID & there’s still residual PTSD though. I need to see a therapist for sure to handle the ups and downs of finding friends with PTSD. Need help with handling embarrassment of explaining crazy family and ex-h. What questions did you ask of therapist to know they can help you? How long did it take you to get back some semblance of a social life? How do you answer the question where are your parents from people you’re just beginning to know & don’t trust to tell the real story to? I kind of feel like damaged goods sometimes.