We quit fussing mother over what she eats years ago. She is constantly dehydrated, but with an internal catheter that STILL manages to leak, I totally understand that to empty the bag, clean it and change it out a 1/2 hour job and hard to do. So she withholds fluids in the hopes she can only have to change twice a day.
At 90, if she wanted to eat candy all day long, I wouldn't say a word. She's tired, she's depressed b/c all but one of her friends are dead. She has not been close to any of her kids or grandkids and wonders why they don't visit. She's definitely a cautionary tale!
None of us fuss her, we just let her be who she is. She always makes the comment that if it weren't for her insulin she'd be dead. I don't know how to respond to that. She's miserable and with COVID, has not left the house in 9 months. That's just made her loneliness worse.
She's 90, we leave her alone. She can't get into trouble, she can barely move. We push her on NOTHING.
Geaton, where did u see that he is 90? I looked at the profile and didn't see an age.
If he is in his 90s, I agree, his cholesterol is not something I would worry about. Keeping hydrated is important but the brain doesn't always tell the body its thirsty. I am 71 and drink very little and always have. I drink when I am thirsty.
Profile says he is in an AL. Are you related orca staff member.
Are you a hired caregiver? Or a spouse? How old are you? At 90 I wouldn't worry about his cholesterol. You will wear yourself out trying to "motivate" him to keep up or do/learn adapt new behaviors or attitudes. He's in active decline, so just let him live out his remaining years doing what he wants as long as he's not harming anyone else. Many seniors watch a lot of tv. That's the only thing they have the energy for, physical or mental. I recommend you do a little reading up on dementia, there's some good videos on YouTube by Teepa Snow, and lots of good books. This way you will have more accurate perspective and expectations for him, making his caregiving less frustrating and disappointing.
I don't know how old Arthur is, but he has a lot of problems. Maybe he wants to enjoy what he can while he still can. If the end comes sooner, then he goes sooner. Just my guess. Have you asked him directly?
Poor Arthur. His bio reads like he is in major disorder and has been that way for awhile now. One thing you don’t mention is dementia. If Arthur is still competent then he gets to chose when to hydrate, avoid high cholesterol foods and increase mobility. He may not make the choices you would make, but God willing, they are his to make. He probably doesn’t feel well and no doubt this is stressful for his loved ones. I suggest you read “Being Mortal, Medicine and What Matters in the End” by Atul Gawande. It might help you both. Best wishes to you and Arthur.
At 90, if she wanted to eat candy all day long, I wouldn't say a word. She's tired, she's depressed b/c all but one of her friends are dead. She has not been close to any of her kids or grandkids and wonders why they don't visit. She's definitely a cautionary tale!
None of us fuss her, we just let her be who she is. She always makes the comment that if it weren't for her insulin she'd be dead. I don't know how to respond to that. She's miserable and with COVID, has not left the house in 9 months. That's just made her loneliness worse.
She's 90, we leave her alone. She can't get into trouble, she can barely move. We push her on NOTHING.
If he is in his 90s, I agree, his cholesterol is not something I would worry about. Keeping hydrated is important but the brain doesn't always tell the body its thirsty. I am 71 and drink very little and always have. I drink when I am thirsty.
Profile says he is in an AL. Are you related orca staff member.
I suggest you read “Being Mortal, Medicine and What Matters in the End” by Atul Gawande. It might help you both.
Best wishes to you and Arthur.
Maybe healthy smoothies would satisfy taste and provide nutrients.