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My mother has dementia and is exhibiting looping dementia behavior that's definitely accompanied with sundown syndrome. Most behavior can be mitigated, but we have lost several doctors and veterinarians due to her constantly calling them several times a day, every day.


Is there a way to block her from calling certain phone numbers? All of them call me multiple times a week; several have openly asked to stop her from calling.


We can't lose anymore doctors in our area. The ones we have now are not refusing service, but they are losing patience with her. I am also losing my sanity, as well, and nothing I say or that my family says can convince her to stop.


We do not have guardianship over her, and we cannot be with her 24/7 because we have to work as well. We spend every spare moment taking care of her, and she is exhibiting no physically dangerous behavior to herself or to others and she is fully aware of where she is living. Any suggestions of outside assistance is met with temper tantrums, and then the shouting begins. So, rational explanations fall on deaf ears.


If there is a way to limit her ability to call certain numbers, it would alleviate some tension in dealing with this horrible disease.

I went into my dad's contacts and changed numbers to people he was calling, I made sure the new # was only 1 or 2 digits off and was not a working number.

As far as the temper tantrums, do what you need to and let her have a temper tantrum. If it gets to outta hand, call 911 to get her transported to the hospital, a psuch ward if needed, to get medicated for her behaviors.
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Reply to Isthisrealyreal
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CaretakerSon1 May 13, 2025
Good ideas, wish it were that simple. It's amazing she can do research on the Internet, but wakes up at 1 am and thinks it's 1 in the afternoon.
So Everytime I change a contact in her phone she looks them up and finds their number again. Funny but frustrating.
It's crazy how in some aspects they are very resourceful, but in just as many ways regressed to toddler lever of understanding and behavior.
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Does she have her own cell phone? If so it might be time to take it away from her, we had to do that with my step-mother, although she was in AL, so we could call her at the nurses station if we needed to TT her.

She kept calling my brother & I, it was driving us nuts.
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My father was constantly calling for pizza delivery. He now has phone that has no numbers just push buttons that correspond to specific people

Future Call Picture Phone with Speakerphone FC-1007SP
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Reply to Arkh64
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We use a Raz Memory phone for our Mom. You can limit both outgoing and incoming calls. There is no access to texting or internet at all. It keeps her from receiving spam calls and also has a ‘quiet hours’ feature. Not perfect, but very helpful in our case!
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I got my mom the GrandPad tablet. She can only make and receive calls (and video calls) from numbers that I programmed in. It also serves as a digital picture frame, and she can play games, listen to music, and see the weather. It lets you add as few or as many functions as you need, so your loved one doesn't get overwhelmed. Sorry to sound like a commercial, but it's worked really well for our family.
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Do you have a long term plan in place? It might be time to decide that now before a sudden hospital visit.
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I found a company called TeleCalm that is fairly inexpensive - a little over $50 a month. You don't have to have an account or connection with another telephone company because it connects through Wifi internet. You can simply put in any phone numbers you wish your loved one to be able to call, and no one else can call them. You can also determine the times of day and night that your loved one can call out, or block certain phone numbers at various times.

We finally had to take my mother's phone out of her room because her Alzheimer's has progressed, and certain family members were having inappropriate conversations with her, but we were very thankful to have TeleCalm available when we needed it!
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Reply to Lee188
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Just a thought
of your mother has dementia I’m presuming she doesn’t know the phone numbers by memory
so change the listed numbers to a non existent telephone number
test it first like 0800 0002109
and when she says it’s not working you say they’re phones broken but you’ll pop round to them
im not familiar with dementia so just a thought
but in answer to your question
you can block numbers- sometimes it used to be via phone company others via actual phone facilities
speak to your telephone company for advice
your mother sounds like she may need an emergency facility tho
are you sure she’s safe living alone now?
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My mother calls ME 20 times a day. I made some changes to her phone situation, and I think it could work well for you. I assume your mother hasn’t memorized their phone numbers. My mom started finding her iPhone difficult to use, so I switched her to a picture phone landline ( I was able to get “landline” internet service to her room). She has no phone books, and no friends or family left to speak of, so I am the only contact on her phone. I was able to disable the operator and 911 buttons. I also had the option of pointing every button on her phone to my number, but you could program in family members. If you take away your mother’s phone directory and phone books, I think she would have a difficult time calling people she shouldn’t be calling. You should probably be the sole phone contact for third parties anyhow at this stage. If she is in your house using your phones, you may need to lock them so she can only use her own. Unless she has numbers memorized, this should solve your problem, or at least reduce the number of calls. My mother still calls me 20 times a day, but at least now she can’t call the police when I don’t answer.
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My mother calls ME 20 times a day. I made some changes to her phone situation. She started finding her iPhone difficult to use, so I switched her to a picture phone landline ( I was able to get “landline” internet service to her room). She has no phone books, and no friends or family left to speak of, so I am the only contact on her phone. I was able to disable the operator and 911 buttons. I also had the option of pointing every button on her phone to my number. If you take away your mother’s phone directory and phone books, I think she would have a difficult time calling people she shouldn’t be calling. You should probably be the sole phone contact for third parties anyhow at this stage. If she is in your house using your phones, you may need to lock them so she can only use her own. Unless she has numbers memorized, this should solve your problem, or at least reduce the number of calls.
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Sounds like she is Lonely and needs a companion staying with her .
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My sister would call me at 10:00 pm. Usually by that time, I'm in bed and don't have phones disturbing me. I can't stand the beeping of my cell phone all night with messages or apps that are nonstop. I had to delete a few of them.

Now, my landline is another story. If I get a call in the middle of the night, it is an emergency or someone has died.
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Patathome01 May 19, 2025
Yes, silence your cell phone so you can rest. You can't be there 24/7!

Your landline is your resort for emergencies only.
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There are ways to block numbers, but you should probably call her cell or landline provider to get details.
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Reply to JanPeck123
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Yes, I set up TeleCalm several years ago and it has been a lifesaver! My mom can only receive and make calls to the phone numbers I have entered in her call list. I block unwanted calls on the Telecalm App on my phone and it sends alerts for repeat dialing. A little time consuming to set up, but the TeleCalm staff was so helpful over the phone. I highly recommend! It's about $65 a month.
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DoingMyBest2 May 19, 2025
I second this comment and sympathize so much! When my mom moved into assisted living I got TeleCalm service for my mom and it has been wonderful. I bought her a landline type phone with a few quick-dial photo buttons on it, and you can also program the service to limit the number of times a person can call out from it within the timeframe you determine. That eliminates repeat calls. You add the phone numbers to it that are ok for her to call or receive calls from, and no others can be completed. If she tries or if someone (like a spam call or others you don't want calling her) calls, they get a message that the call can't be completed. That was very important, since she was gullible, vulnerable, had already been scammed several times and it had been such a challenge trying to protect her. I also have it set to quiet hours - not complete calls or receive calls after 9 PM. She's been using it for two years now and is (mostly) happy with it. She does get annoyed occasionally if she can't repeatedly dial someone, but thinks there's something wrong with that person's phone - not hers.
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Depending on her phone style, you can set limits to contacts only and remove them as contacts (if you are a medical POA and doctors primarily communicate with you).
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Reply to JenJen24
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Check out a Grandpad from Consumer Cellular. It worked out wonderfully for my mom who had dementia and was in assisted living. It has many great features and is very reasonably priced.
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Reply to Animalpal
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can you take phone from her? if she has dimentia why would she need phone - there must be ways the nurse can contact you should your mom need assistance.
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Reply to AngieGuido74
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So sorry about your mother!! I like MeDolly's idea!! Get that phone away from Your Mom!

When you want to Talk with Her, call the staff where she lives and get Yourself Connected with Mom. Explain your mother's situation that her phone is blocked and removed from her possession for her disruptive behavior.

If she insists keeping her phone, You can block her calls to own phone during Unwanted Hours because you work and require rest and peace. The last resort is to change some digits on her phone so they so her calls cannot reach her professionals since they have other patients to see. Just leave yours, some relatives and friends correct numbers on her phone. For God's Sake, what about 911??

Talk with her doctor's and other professionals about your mother's behavior. Mother cannot interrupt. What can a social worker do to control your mom besides explain what she is doing? It sounds like toddler behavior!
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Reply to Patathome01
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Hi!

If it is a cellphone she is using, you can try removing the contacts from her phone. Good luck! <3
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Reply to SandwichGen15
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I took all phone numbers contacts out of my Dad’s phone, except for my number & my brother’s number..He had us on speed dial one & speed dial two..Within months, he was not able to use his cell phone & carried it around for “comforts’ sake.” Hope this helps..🙏🏼🤗
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TouchMatters May 22, 2025
Thank you. Very helpful to many here. Gena
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Honestly, this thread brings up PTSD for me.

When my mom had a UTI, was hospitalized for two weeks, and was delirious, she would call me 20+ times a day because even though she didn't know where she was, what day of the week it was, etc. she knew my cell number. I couldn't block the hospital's number or her room phone because docs would call me from her room while they were rounding. But, after she called 911 twice in the same night to report she was being held captive in the basement of an abandoned farm house, the hospital removed the phone from her room.

When she went to rehab, it was the same thing all over again for weeks. I started silencing my phone overnight, and I'd wake up to see she had called 15 times overnight, and left 15 hysterical messages.

When she had meningitis and was delusional later that same year, it was the same thing all over again.

Eventually she got better and went back home. Mom had a lot of medical crises and hospitalizations, and because she insisted on keeping every single discharge summary (I mean there were stacks), she could always find the office number for docs and then hysterically call them when her anxiety was spiking. Fortunately none ever dropped her as a patient.

I don't have an answer for you, but trust me: I feel your pain.
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Reply to JRwornout
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Yes you can.
Call her phone company.
Get another / new phone if necessary.

Why does she have a phone if this is happening - to the point she is losing MDs and vets?

No, of course, you cannot convince her to stop. As you say, she has 'dementia.'
Look at Teepa Snow's webinars and You Tubes on how to manage / deal with a person doing these behaviors.

Gena / Touch Matters
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Patathome01 May 19, 2025
I think the phone should be taken away from her mother, delete the unwanted recipients, then program only wanted numbers for her mother to use. If any of her professionals need to reach her, they will have to call indirectly to her daughter, first.
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Take those numbers out of her phone directory. Keep them in your phone. Otherwise, stop her phone service.
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Reply to Taarna
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After reading this, I guess I'm lucky so far.. My Dad is living with me and I take his phone away from him when I go to bed at night. He was calling my brother's at 1am or any time during the night & yelling at them about not being able to drive.
He sometimes still asks why I take his phone at night and I just tell him why.
He Still denies he does or did it.
Good luck. Sounds like a lot of good advice on here.
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Patathome01 May 23, 2025
Yes, keep his phone away for good with his judgement decline, so bury it somewhere, do not recharge it and let it go Out Of Service to get you Peace!

Sorry, I don’t mean disrespect, but enough is enough and it is too much.
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Why is she still allowed to have a phone and why is she not in a care facility?

Your mother cannot be live alone or be left alone anymore. You having to work does not mitigate this fact.

She needs to be placed in supervised living (AL) or live-in caregivers have to be moved in to watch her 24/7.
As for her tantrums and shouting. Here's how you handle that. She's not in charge anymore. So either she accepts whatever help you and the rest of the family come up with, or you do nothing for her. Then you tell her that if the phone calls don't stop, and she doesn't stop with the stubbornness about outside help, the state will put her in a home against her will. I have seen this happen many, many times over the years.

Show her this comment. It comes from a person who was a homecare worker for 25 years and who now has a business of it.

Nothing will get a senior a one-way ticket to a nursing home faster than being stubborn.

Call all of these doctors, vets, and businesses and tell them what's going on. Ask them to call APS because you are at a loss as what to do for your mother who is refuses all help. Ask them to call APS.
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