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I'm concerned . He is being a bully. intimidating me with threats of a suit. telling me I can't view her financial records. when does Poa go into effect? If my mom says I can view her financial records does her word prevail? her memory is going and i have told him that we cannot trust that what she says is the true reality. He won't talk to me. The poa gives him power to change beneficiaries. really? can he? he has always taken care of her investments and is poa for that reason.

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Lol, Midkid! As much as I tell my husband I am always right - I secretly have to admit
here that that isn't always the case. But thanks!

My experience as DPOA was similar to Mom2mom. While my dad was alive he took care of all the administrative functions in their lives. Once my dad passed away my mother couldn't sign on the dotted line fast enough to shift that responsibility to me. At the time my mother was showing no signs of cognitive decline - just that pesky little oxycodone issue.
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I'm a bit puzzled by the OP's saying that her brother is threatening her with suits. What's *he* going to sue *her* for?

MNB, could you explain what the underlying cause is of the disagreements you and your brother are having?
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Rainmom--
AS always, you're right. I think I was just thinking of our particular situation..POA writing them selves checks.
And yes--POA ends with the death--what am I thinking today?? Poor night sleep!
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"POA doesn't mean "write yourself checks all day". It actually doesn't even go into effect unless the person is deemed incompetent to make decisions or has died. "

Not always the case. My mother gave me POA decades before her mental decline. She just never wanted to learn how to write checks or pay her bills (Always had been Dad's job in their marriage). So, when Dad was in and out of hospitals, he gave me POA and when he passed, Mom gave me POA, effective immediately, for the purpose of managing her finances even though she continued working full time for several more years.

And, as to the last part. POA does not go into effect when someone dies. It is the opposite, in fact. The POA ends when a person dies.
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I spoke a little too soon. A POA can change beneficiaries ONLY if the POA document specifically says this power is allowed. Even then, any reputable company would make sure every legal I and T is crossed and dotted before they would allow this to happen.

If it were me - that tiny amount of wiggle room would make me uneasy. Original advice stands - get an attorney.
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My brother is POA. My mother is competent and has told me numerous times where she keeps her financials and told me to look at it whenever wanted. As POA, and mom being competent, my brother can't stop me (nor would he, actually) so one day a few weeks ago, I was at mother's and did take advantage of an hour's wait time to peruse the documents.
Some surprises--but for the most part, a very upfront will. Maybe my mother is unusual in allowing us to read the will before she dies, but also, there's nothing to inherit, so more likely she just wants me to know what she wants done for her funeral.
POA doesn't mean "write yourself checks all day". It actually doesn't even go into effect unless the person is deemed incompetent to make decisions or has died.
IF your mom says "go ahead and look" then take advantage of that. Brother can deal. Hopefully your mother has copies in her safekeeping. I know brother has one set, mother has the other. If he won't oblige, then get legal on him. I hate to say that, I like to think families can get alone (hahahahahaha) but the truth is, if he won't let you look at it and mom does, he's hiding something.
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No, a POA can not change beneficiaries- not legally anyhow. A skevy, sneaky POA could very likely find a way to do it - then it would be up to you to prove it not valid when the time came. And that is very difficult to do.

Do what you can to protect your interests and those of your mothers now. Find a good elder care attorney.
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If she is still deemed competent and the POA hasn't been activated, he can't really go around saying chit like that. I would talk to an elder lawyer and APS to protect yourself. You brother might be changing that stuff illegally to make sure his greedy, sorry butt gets everything.
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