Many of us who were hands on caregivers were in control of every aspect of our care recipient's lives, we knew what they ate and when, their bowel habits, sleep habits, medications etc. Once they enter a facility we are asked to hand that responsibility to someone else - at first it can be a welcome relief and a burden lifted but I find it increasingly difficult to have to go begging for every bit of information about my mom, and out of fear of becoming a pest not asking for nearly as much as I would like. Today I thought - wouldn't it be easier if we could have online access to their daily care records?

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Definitely Yes, need more up to date information. Sure, care conferences are good, but I am there daily to help her with lunch, but since the CNAs and LPNs rotate I’m never sure who I’m supposed to ask about the nitty gritty. I find out thru the grapevine that she didn’t eat breakfast, or spit out her morning meds, or was up all night. Or led the breakfast table in song. So I’m constantly trying to run down the people who “have mom” each day. If I am responsible for her health care decisions, I don't feel I have access to all the data to make good choices when her condition can change daily. This disease does not wait for care conferences.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to rocketjcat

We only get annual care conferences here, we have one coming up in a couple of weeks.
And even though I am there every day (often multiple times a day) I can't say that there is anyone working there who I would consider a confidant. Some are better communicators than others but I never am told anything I don't specifically ask about (except medication changes, which are mandated) or anything beyond what I see with my own eyes. After a year I had my first chat with her doctor just yesterday, he kept talking about how we all needed to be on the same page but it wasn't until later I realized that he never really said what page he was on. Mrs W is declining... was that a question or a statement?
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Reply to cwillie

As long as my mom was kept safe, fed and well-cared for in her SNF, which she was, I didn’t feel the need to know every time she tooted. I was done with my managing her daily care and was glad to hand it over to very capable people. I trusted them to share with me anything I needed to know and they always did. If anything needed my approval or permission, I was always called and informed. I visited frequently and got to know and very much like and trust the staff who cared for her. I saved any non-urgent concerns for the Care Conferences every three months. Any pressing issues were always answered within a day. I was always content with how she was treated.
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Reply to Ahmijoy

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