One of the hardest parts of being a caregiver is the painful isolation. It seems many others say the same. I often feel forgotten by family, invisible even and wonder do they care? Or are they just forgetful because we are not able to be involved like other family and friends. It hurts especially during holidays and important dates, hospital stays and times when leaving the house is impossible.
Of course, my family cares and occasionally they ask how the boys are. But asking how I am is not frequently asked. I am told they are so confident I can handle things they never doubt if I am making through the day. Which should be a compliment, but it's not always. At times, during really hard times, it feels like an excuse to forget me.
Even if that is not the truth, emotionally drained it can feel that way. So it got me thinking. What would I even want them to say or do for a daily uplift? One member here mentioned encouraging text messages would be nice. I agree and I do get emails a bit more frequently. But during long hospital admissions where I don't get home for weeks at a time. Text is the one dependable thing I can access. And there are many weeks that the number of medical appointments keep us out of the home as we sit in waiting rooms or for medical procedures etc to finish, my laptop is not able to be carried. So what would help? What would be an encouraging message to me? To you?
-Hey, was thinking about the boys today and wondering how are YOU doing?
-I found this funny joke and thought it might cheer you up- (insert funny joke or quote)
-I remember when you encouraged me and told me( same to you)
-Send a funny gif or comic image
-Silly family photo ar quick video that says I love you etc.
-We love you, and don't give up. We believe in you.
-Hey, did you remember to take a nap/medicine/meditate- whatever self care thing I am known to forget.
What would you like to hear or think to say to someone in a difficult caregiving role? Am I alone? Maybe there are other ideas? I would say mail a greeting card but an entire week can go buy without me being able to walk to the community mail station to pick up mail. Ideas?