I have a social worker who had demonstrated unethical behavior for over 1 year. Most recently she has colluded with my elderly mother, diagnosed with dementia to have me evicted from our family home. I care for my 88 year old Father with prostate cancer, whom I discovered was uncared for and walking around with undiagnosed cancer prior to my arrival 2 years ago. My mother would subject him to full blown rages where he would shiver in fear, leaving him traumatized by her screaming. Knowing she showed symptoms of dementia, it would take an arrest to have her evaluated and confirmed with the disease. The SW that took my complaint sympathized with her and has taken a personal interest in having me removed from our family home, even going as far as to recommend services that do not compare to the care I provide for my sick Father. With our family divided over my parents care, my Father chose both me and my sister as his agents and POA. Since the POA secures my residency and care for my Father, my Mother was unsuccessful at having me evicted. Exactly 3 days of learning that my Mother's suit was dropped, the SW paid me a visit, accused me of manipulating my parents and taking my Father's money, a charge my Mother falsified not one week after her arrest. I keep tight records and receipts and was never charged. This time the SW lied stating I told her that I was going to move out one year earlier, a conversation that was never had; then she moved on to the eviction, when I stated it was unsuccessful due to my POA and caregiver status, she questioned the validity of the POA and DEMANDED to see it. I went to show her, and called my sister to witness the call. The SW became agitated, told me "you can't record me", when I explained that it was legal and by remaining she agreed to be witnessed, she ended the visit and ran. She returned one week later because my brother secretly asked her to, and I came downstairs to record her, and she said.." you are not going to record me.." and ran again. She followed up with a phone call, I had my sister on the call to witness it and she quickly hung up AGAIN!!! She finally made contact with her supervisor, who never identified herself and demanded a copy of the POA, which has nothing to do with what she claimed she was investigating BUT a focus on getting me evicted by nullifying a POA drafted by Attorney's. Her behavior and intentions are clearly biased and unethical. I need to know the boundaries of her legal authority to demand my Father's legal documents AND as a licensed professional, what are the steps to go after her liscencing for abuse of power and interfering in the care of an elderly cancer patient? Any wisdom out there?
When you say family is divided, does that mean you have more than one sibling? Why are you not cooperating with the investigation?
My questions are when you say the family is divided, does that mean you have more siblings than your sister? Also, why are you not cooperating with the investigation?
From what you have written, the tone and the anger towards your mom, it sounds like the worker has a legit concern over HER care and treatment. You and dad are not the concern.
So as POA, you cannot gain financial advantage. So are mom and dad's names both on the house? What are you doing for your mom exactly? Your mom has rights in her home.
I would suggest not being so combative and cooperate. Investigations are usually one or two visits.
There is no anger towards my Mother who is clearly ill, how could it be? She is ill. Dementia is a broken brain. There is heightened anxiety between caring for her in this state and protecting my Father which is like walking a tight rope constantly. They both need to be protected in different ways. Division, of course there is division? IF, there are 2 adult siblings who neglected to visit often enough to even see what I discovered immediately from getting off a plane, shouldn't you question why that was? LOVE shows up. Its does not do what is convenient is sacrifices to fix what is broken. AND, are you not glossing over the fact that these are our parents, with totally different life threatening illnesses that require a decision making that will impact an entire family as a whole? I wish you see them through my eyes, they are not patients, they are my fragile Mom and Dad and dependent on me to make sure they are well. To imagine, assume or even interpret that interacting with the combativeness and aggression, typical of dementia patients is "fighting with your mother" is irresponsible. If you had any knowledge of this disease, its symptoms and how it isolates the brain to certain people, events and lifestyle in their history versus their present, you would have a better understanding of this dynamic, much like those who have posted with helpful solutions. As it pertains to the POA, attorney's are licensed professionals who make determinations of the mental soundness of the individual PRIOR to drafting this legal document and the criteria is framed around those observations and the desires of the one being protected. I encourage you to read the post of those managing the care of an elderly parent with this disease, it isn't something you are prepared for, but you'd better get as much help as you can. Your impressions couldn't be more wrong.
Its been said on this forum to be leery of bringing the government into your life. Your a good example why not to. So you have POA for Dad but not Mom. Just wondering, why don't you remove him from the house and let this SW be responsible for Mom? Maybe if you and Dad were out of the picture the SW would see that Mom has problems.
If Mom is ever violent, call the police. Tell them she is a threat and you cannot allow her back into the house until she is evaluated physically and neurologically. Actually, if I had to choose, I would try to get Mom placed in LTC with Medicaid paying for her care and Dad being able to stay in the home. A lawyer versed in Medicaid can explain what Dad becoming the Community Spouse means.
Good Luck
My prevailing question to every adult grandchild who knew...and every adult who would listen is, for the past 2 years is ..." HOW do we get her help and HOW do we protect him from her rages..." ...I got crickets. My elder brothers who were HERE, have not surfaced to answer to the neglect and exploitation.
Your mother has rights, as well.
But if you need what's offered here.......Go Get 'Em Tiger! Stay The Course! Put Your Feet In The Right Place & Stand Firm!
Now go get defined legal guidance.