We live with my husband's parents. Mother in law is getting looked at for dementia/Alzheimer's disease. I hear my in laws arguing over something. Should I be trying to break up the argument or let them be? I know my in laws get very upset with each other and themselves.

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Thank you blannie, wally003 and SusanA43 for your opinion.
I'll just keep my ears open for unusual noise and keep myself out of it.
Helpful Answer (2)

As long as it's not physical, I'd let it go. Ask your husband if this is normal behavior for them or if he is concerned. If he is, let him do the intervening as their son - he will carry more weight than you will and probably have more ability to stop them.

When my then-husband's parents lived with us, his father was dying of cancer and was not getting enough oxygen to his brain - which causes severe, sudden personality shifts.  We had to move them in with us because of it - he had guns in his house and was threatening to shoot his wife or anyone that came in the door.  When we got the guns put away where he couldn't get to them, then he looked for something heavy enough to do damage and started throwing things at his wife.  He narrowly missed hitting her in the head with a heavy glass ashtray.  A few hours later, he didn't remember doing it - any of it.  Those are the kind of arguments you need to watch out for.  The dementia/ALZ brain is unpredictable.  
Helpful Answer (7)

my mom and dad both with Alzheimer's (dad was worse off) both living at AL
my dad wouldn't co-operate with the aids. and my mom would hit my dad. and then my dad would try to hit her back. (and I swear I never heard them argue when I lived at home up to age 18) They were both super calm (not me, I can be a hot head)

I think they would both stay angry for a bit, until they both completely forgot about it.

so maybe if its something like don't want it to escalate in case theyre still strong enough to hurt each other.

now me and my husband. we argue sometimes. not physical. so I wouldn't want someone to tell me to stop because we were having a disagreement.
Helpful Answer (5)

Generally speaking, I'd stay out of it unless you can divert one or both of them to something else. Couples married for a long time have their routines and trying to change that is a pretty thankless task. If there is anger or threats, then definitely get involved. Otherwise, I'd let them argue, assuming they've been married for a long time. If anyone should intervene, it should be your husband if he's around. 
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