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My sister whom is terminal chose to go on a cruise, this week, January 2022. The family was all set to go and the CDC advised against cruises. My father who has pulmonary issues, past lung cancer, emphysema and diabetic, his doctor told him it was not safe for him to travel on a plane then a cruise. Now we are experiencing severe regrets. I am ate up with worry for her and him I couldn’t even get excited about the trip. I will probably always regret the decision to stay back. How does one get past something like this?

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You get past it by reminding yourself - as often as you need to - that you made the best decision you could with the information you had at hand. You didn't make any decision out of spite or malice of forethought; you weighed your options and chose the best one.

Hindsight is always 20/20. And playing the "what if?" game is nothing but an exercise in futility. If every choice we had to make in life was between "good" and "bad" life would be much simpler. Heartbreakingly, however, very often the choices lie between bad, worse and worst.

I offer you my sympathies. With a terminally ill sister and a chronically, seriously ill father, I think you have enough sorrow in your life without adding to it unnecessarily, by second guessing decisions that you can't do anything about at this point anyway.
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Reply to notgoodenough
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You made a decision based on what the CDC advised you to do and now you're having regrets for not going on the cruise with dad & the rest of the family? I think that's what you're saying. If so, you 'get past it' by not second guessing yourself. Had you gone, you probably wouldn't have enjoyed yourself due to fear, so you put yourself in a no-win situation either way.

When your sister gets back, vow to spend time with her no matter WHAT the 'experts' tell you to do. That's the important thing here, and if you do spend quality time with her, you won't be left with regrets, cruise or no cruise.

Good luck
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Reply to lealonnie1
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Not sure where sp19690 is getting their information, but it's not correct, so please refrain from putting that out there when you clearly don't know what you are talking about. For those of us who work in the thick of covid and its trail of destruction to even suggest that people don't get vaccinated is a crime.
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Reply to jb1963
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sp19690 Jan 13, 2022
Neither do you. We are now on the recommendation coming for a 4th shot because apparently the other 3 are useless as we see the breakthrough infections among the vaxxed. We now know the vaccinated can infect others. Maybe we should start banning the vaxxed from all the places the unvaxxed are getting banned from instead.

After firing all the unvaxxed heath care workers California is now telling covid positive nurses and doctors that they have to work because of the personal shortage they created. Where's the science behind that decision?
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We could all write a chapter of the book “Things I would have done Differently” But we make the best decisions we can at the time. Your family chose a trip that I hope, given the medical conditions, will be healing and fun for them. And you did the best for you
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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I'm not sure where you are in life (age-wise) but I am recently retired and decided to move back to my hometown to be with my Mom who will be 91 next month.

You sound like a very caring person in that you began with the worry you have for your father and you are expressing the "worry" as a reason for staying back. I want to thank you for putting your family first in a world where often people put themselves first. You are a blessing to your family. We will get through this virus and have a new normal, it's just that we have had it so easy compared to other generations and we are not use to making these sacrifices. You did the right thing. Hopefully you will get a chance to make that trip someday and it will seem all the sweeter.
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Reply to Kepidee
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This is a part of what everyone in our nation is now experiencing. We are in the third year of a pandemic that isn't going away yet. I am so sorry. It has had such severe repercussions for you. I think there is no question that it would be unwise for your Dad to go on this trip, or risky. He will have to make his own decisions. While Omicron is often not a problem for healthy individuals it is quite capable of killing someone who is older and has underlying problems. I think the decision not to go for your Dad is a wise one. Others will have to make their own decisions. It is very very sad. It is worthy of regrets. But all said and done there is little to be done about it but accept the realities of the situation.
It must be a very sad disappointment to all. I wish you the best.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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sp19690 Jan 11, 2022
So omicron just like the flu is capable of killing people who are older and have underlying health issues. Interesting. Yet people's lives have been and are still being ruined over a virus that kills mainly old and already sick people. I hope the media enjoys all that free money they got from Joey B to help spread lies and disinformation To coerce people to get vaccinated. The latest all those children who had covid but they left out the part about them being in the hospital for something else and then testing positive for covid.
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You made the best decision possible for your father's safety.. It would have been reckless to put him in a travel environment while COVID is so active. If your sister is relating exciting stories about her own trip, be happy for her that she is enjoying this adventure. Plan a different trip for you and your father when it is safer to do so.
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Reply to RedVanAnnie
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Covid is a serious health issue, especially for the old, sick and disabled.It’s a shame that 840,000 Americans have died of what a political party declared was a hoax and that people are still dying because the lies are killing them.

Common sense and kindness need to prevail during these difficult times. If you value your life and that of your family and friends always err on the side of caution.
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polarbear Jan 13, 2022
Don't get political.

Covid is real.
Covid started from China. That's a fact.

What is not true?
Masks are effective- not true.
Vaccines are safe- not true
Vaccines are effective- not true
Covid tests are accurate- not true
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My friend took her Dad on a mini vacation, he got Covid, and after a few months of fighting for his life, died 2 days ago. How do you think she feels? You did the right thing, despite it being an incredibly hard thing to do. I applaud you.
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Reply to NYCmama
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KaleyBug Jan 13, 2022
You need to clarify, Did they take precautions, wear mask was he vaccinated and boosted. A mini vacation if done with precautions should not end like this. Our entire family was vaccinated we did Christmas but dad wore an KN95 the whole time and we kept everyone at a distance. He was still able to watch presents being opened and participate in conversations. It is all about safety. A cruise can be done safely. The cleaning on the ship is excellent. You just need to be careful.
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Perhaps it's not a bad idea after all. They might die soon, or may be not.
What's wrong if they want to enjoy a cruise? The alternative will be to to have a boring long wait until they die. If it were my case, I wouldn't cancel the cruise even if I die in the attempt. I rather die happy than bored.
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Myownlife Jan 15, 2022
Exactly!
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