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Right now, I feel like giggling the night away.
Thank you for your comments and suggestions. You are absolutely correct about things we should do for ourselves. You mention needing to journal about your experiences...I just(in April)released a self-published book called "Lost & Found", it's available online under my author name; 'Lance Knight". My little novel is fictional and is not about my day to day care-giving but the point is that I stayed up after my mother went to bed each night and began just writing what came into my head(handwritten on legal paper)and the next thing I knew I had written a story. So I found it to be most therapeutic as I took that time to let my thoughts and feelings flow onto the page.
Qigong is a moving meditation (chinese) that keep me in an excellent frame of mind and gets me out of the house for two hours once a week. My husband watches mom so I can go.
The practice is a type of Tai Chi (or maybe the other way around :) of 64 gentle movements that are done in sinc with the whole class. it is adaptive for folks with physical problems too, as some do it sitting. You do not need any experience or even be in good shape. Two in my class struggle with major weight issues and they are as graceful and lovely as anyone in my class.
Qigong been a life saver for me. I've tried regular mediation classes, but find I am so much in "go mode", that trying to sit still and relax was literally stressing me out more. Since I find needlework (also recommend) and walking relaxing, I decided to give a 'moving' meditation a try. Feels like I hit the lottery... I LOVE IT!
I can practice in as little as 10 minutes at home. When I am driving home from my weekly class, I can honestly say it is the best I ever feel and husband can attest that I always walk in the door with a smile on my face. Practicing with the group aka flock, is quiet, soothing, beautiful and bonding.
If you don't have Tai Chi or Qigong classes in your area, dvd can be bought online. Public television in my area has a Qigong program.
~5+ years caregiving and counting. first w/ middle school special needs "at risk" nephew (hardest of all) for two years. Then my father with advanced Parkinson's, degenerative spine/pain condition and stage IV colon cancer. Now caregiving my schizophrenic mom with vascular dementia and aphasia (loss of normal speech) due to two strokes.
Qigong has literally saved my attitude and possibly my life, as I am very much aware of the caregiver mortality rates...
Take care each and every one of you~ xo sam in california
A positive attitude is an infectious, powerful thing that takes practice and allows you to enjoy what you're doing -- even when your heart isn't in it. When you're not all there, the caregivee feels it and might resist somehow. Which makes you feel even worse.
We all wear different masks every day. When caregiving, pick the happy one and stay in character. They say that when you act "as if" you become. ... So give it a shot. It might work.
Good luck my sister.
I remember what a good Dad my Father was. What a good Grandfather he was.
I picture what my life on this earth will be like when he is no longer on it.
All those things can usually help me change my perspective when I am burdened and weighed down with chores, depression, responsibility.