My parents' will need guardianship eventually, but I can't afford it - help please.


My parents are fine now but there will come a day, maybe in the next couple years, where a guardianship may be needed due to declining mental health. The thing one wants to be that person (not one of my mom's 6 living siblings), and I think it is very reckless for me to do it. I'm only 21, fresh out of college as a biologist. I refuse to give up my dream of being a biologist to move home and watch over my parents - they paid for my schooling! They have home health paid for by the state, and I control their money as best I can with my DPOA. So far it's been alright, but on occasion their choices worry me. I've heard of there being remote guardians, but is that realistic for everyone? I don't have the money to drive/fly home at the drop of a hat. I know I could get government assistance with legal fees, but that's not the problem. I don't think I'm ready for watching over my parents at the capacity of a guardian, and I know they hate the idea of it too. Like if they have to move for some reason, I'd be legally obligated to move them. They don't have the spare cash it takes to move, and I most certainly don't either. So who would pay for it? What if they need dental work that costs more than a usual visit? As a guardian, I'd need to find them help, but I also don't have the money to pay for something like that. Long story short, if I'm too young to have my own kid, then it's irresponsible that my family expect me to become guardian of TWO people because they don't want to. I'm guessing there's not a lot of help out there for this situation, but let me know what you've done. Please don't say "suck it up and do it" because I really can't.

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You are not obligated to become a guardian for your parents. Durable Power of Attorney and Durable Health POA should be more than enough for you to be able to help them. You will not be personally responsible for any bills, unless you sign a guarantee, read and understand everything you sign on their behalf.

You may have to step back and let the state become their guardian, it is unrealistic to expect siblings to take over their care, as it is unrealistic to expect you to do it. That is why the government is in a position to help. A 3rd party would make sure their needs are met and they are safe, if we can not take care of ourselves that is what really matters.

Do not let anyone guilt you into giving up your life to care for your parents. You can love them, visit them and make sure they are being taken care of and have a life that makes them proud.
Helpful Answer (1)
Reply to Isthisrealyreal

Guardianship usually can be taken out of parents money. But, it's a lot of responsibility and you have to keep the State up with how their money is spent.
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Reply to JoAnn29

South Dakota rarely is a guardian and you have to get written statement from every single living family member why they don't take on a ward. There's a guardian program but it's $125 an hour. South Dakota is a god forsaken state when it comes to stuff like this.
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Reply to aj6044

Don't do it. Becoming a guardian is like adopting a child. You will legally be responsible for them. Any hope you have for your own life will be over. Their siblings need to step up and be an adult. Or, you may need to bring in the state.
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Reply to needtowashhair