She is only 54 she is still young in my opinion for this to be happening. She starting to forget a lot of things. Things she would cook she has forgotten how to cook certain things to the point she doesn’t look like she used to. She also the same questions over and over. She can’t explain herself properly and she forgets her words. If she has a conversation with someone as soon as the conversation is over, she is more than likely going to forget what was said. She seems to be in panic mode a lot. She still works as of now, but I don’t know if she is going to be able to continue because she is a cashier. She can still drive and everything. She has had a lot of stressful events in her life, and she doesn’t deal with life situations very well and I’m not sure if those situations could have caused this. Sometimes she does okay, and you would think everything is going to be fine then other times it’s like she is getting worse. She has a 15-year-old son and today he had a dentist appointment. She didn’t even remember what the dentist said about his teeth and future appointments, and I had to call the myself to get the information. I also had to call and make the appointment because she can’t use her words or find the right words. I’m worried because I don’t know what life is going to be like for her 6 months to a year from now. The doctors did a MRI of her brain back in November but she has not had a follow up appointment yet she had one on February 12 but they said they had to reschedule. I’m going to call her doctors myself to setup an appointment. I’m concerned is there something that can be done to give her a better quality of life or at least manage the symptoms because she is not that old? This is really stressing me I’m not ready to lose her mentally. A lot of times I must explain things to her over and over and over and she still does not understand, and she gets mad with me. It’s like she is still herself, but she is not herself if that makes sense. The other night she asked her 15-year-old son did he want some food and I told her he had already eaten and before the night was over, she had asked this same question 3 or 4 times and this is something she does at times repeat questions over and over. Is there any hope or is this going to be lifelong situation?
Has she gone through menopause yet?
I know that sounds insane - and your description sounds like quite a bit more - but it's worth looking into if she has not yet gone through it.
I actually scheduled an appointment to talk to my doctor about early onset dementia when I was about 47. I honestly thought I was losing my mind. I couldn't remember if I was coming or going most days. I forgot words - I looked at DH one day and told him to "hand me the sharp, pointy thing that you write with" because I couldn't remember the word pencil. I had to cancel a work meeting one day because I could not remember the leader code for my bridgeline- that I used nearly every single day, multiple times, for years. DH found the milk in the pantry, the apples in the freezer, the soup cans in the fridge after a grocery trip one day.
I am not saying this is what is going on with your mom - regardless it necessitates a visit to the doctor.
When I went for my appointment I described what was happening and he asked me if we had checked my hormones. Quick test and it was very clear I was in menopause.
She could potentially be in early on set, she could be having other panic disorders, she could have anything going on realistically at 54.
Wishing you the best.
This could be a panic/anxiety disorder or some sort of mental illness, but you are correct that it sounds most like some dementia, and it would be, if so, a very very early onset.
You are going to need a neuro-psyc evaluation. This is beyond a normal regular MD, but that regular MD is where you need to start to urine testing and blood panel.
I agree with others to have all medications and supplements listed for the MD.
I hope you will update us after her evaluation. And I surely do wish you the best of luck.
The first thing is diagnosis.
This could be anything from Anxiety with panic disorder to a glioblastoma of the brain.
Time to insist she see an MD.
But if that checks out fine, then it is very possible that your mother has what is called early onset Alzheimer's, and sadly there is absolutely nothing at this point and time that will stop it or slow it down.
And the sad thing about early onset Alzheimer's is that it can go on for 20+ years, so I would suggest that you have your mother get all her legal ducks in a row,( i.e. POA's, Will, MOST or POLST forms etc.)
A man in my caregivers support group, lost his wife this past July, and she had early onset Alzheimer's for 21 years. She was diagnosed in her late 50's.
Make sure that her doctor(neurologist)is made aware of everything that is going on with her, even if you have to contact them via the patient portal or by handing the nurse a note prior to her appointment so you don't have to talk about her in front of her.
And if diagnosed with Alzheimer's, please DO NOT let her continue to drive and put all those innocent people on the road in harms way of a woman driving with a demented brain. God forbid she hit and kill or seriously injure someone. If the police found out that she was diagnosed with Alzheimer's, she could literally lose everything if a lawsuit were to be filed against her.
You are in for a very long and hard road if in fact your mother has Alzheimer's, and my heart goes out to you and your family. Please educate yourself as much as you can about the disease so you will be better prepared for what lies ahead.
You may need to help her to do this, given how she is unable to manage things right now. Like funkygrandma59 suggested, she could have a UTI, a thyroid problem, vitamin deficiency, dehydration, diabetes, stroke, tumor, etc. All these can create dementia-like symptoms and are mostly treatable. Not being able to find the right words or apply them properly is called aphasia, and can be caused by TIAs.
If your Mom takes prescription medications (think for thyroid, opioids for pain, sleeping pills, depression meds) is it possible she is under- or over-medicating herself? Check her medicine cabinet and count pills, since she may not be remembering if and when she took them.
Dementia is usually diagnosed by discounting all other causes. Alzheimers is a form of dementia that one can get very early in life (my friend's Mom was diagnosed at 58, which mean she had it long before her symptoms were undeniable). A neurologist can do a brain scan to see changes in her brain, but I would start with her primary physician to discount all other possibilities.
You need to actually be in her exam room with her to take notes and give her doctor accurate answers to the questions they will ask her. At that clinic, ask for the HIPAA Medical Representative form and write your name in and have her sign it. This way her medical team can legally discuss her private medical information with you without her having to be present or give permission. If she's forgetful, this will be critical -- they won't talk to you otherwise, unless she's present.
And yes, your Mom needs to get her legal ducks in a row now while she still can if it turns out she does have ALZ. There is a drug called Aricept that has shown some effectiveness in slowing down the progress of ALZ but it only works for a short time and doesn't always work for everyone.
I told my brother a POA let people know he gives me permission to do things for like banking, getting him to doctors and financial and health decisions. Get POA as soon as possible—even before the first doctors’s appointment—for health and finances. You’re going to be the one driving the bus now and POA will make life far easier for everyone everywhere—doctors, etc.
This is really a situation for medical care.
If, after a physical work-up is completed, her primary provider should then refer her to a neurologist who could then look for possible causes of memory loss or dementia. There are many types of dementia and depending on the type, certain treatments or medications can be helpful. Although a cure may not be possible with dementia, there are treatments that can improve her function and lifestyle.
"It's like she is still herself but she is not herself" makes perfect sense to me. My husband has dementia. He seems like the same person, but not really anymore. There are times when he's almost his old self and able to have a conversation. Other times, that's impossible, and that's becoming a lot more frequent. He can't work, can't drive.
Dementia caregivers do worry about how the disease will be like in the future. What will it look like this time next year? Cause last year it was not as bad, does that mean there will be drastic changes this year? No one knows. No one, until it has progressed to a severity that they're totally incapacitated.
Of course until you know what's going on, the behaviors may be treatable. If you're not satisfied with the doctors seeing her, get a second opinion. Especially if you're in a rural area.
Keep us updated. There is a lot of great advice here.
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