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My mother has had dementia for 3 years. I just found out my mother has signed over the deed to her house over to my sister. My mom told me the other day that she signed a bunch of papers on her house concerning the deed. she doesn't know why or how come my sister did that. I also went to her filing cabinet and noticed all my moms bank statements and will is gone. I've confronted my sister and she just tells me to don't worry about it. Also when I asked her to bring my moms bank statements back she told me no. Isn't this illegal and if it is what type of attorney can I call for help

This could be very good or very bad. Which depends on what your mom’s future financial situation becomes.

The “good”would be that mom’s dementia is such that mom cannot handle $ anymore, so there was fraud, etc worries so Sissy condensed banking to deal with things. Maybe put property into a Trust so it could bypass probate which is usually a good estate move. But I’ll bet a case of Prosecco, this was not what happened but instead Sissy did a $ grab. And this will become an issue once mom become more frail and needs caregiving and a facility.

I’ll bet your mom is not sitting on a nest egg of $300K and a home worth 700K; mom does not have a coterie of family and friends and church members who all can devote whatever 24/7 time needed to caregive and run errands for mom for your mom’s foreseeable future till forever. I’ll bet your mom is like more elderly in the US…… mom has a modest home, maybe worth 300K and the average Social Security monthly income of around $1,200/1800 a month and maybe a smallish savings of 50K. And that dear Frank Paz will pose very real issues with what your Sister has done by signing over your moms house to her and ditto for moms banking and other financials for the day when mom needs caregiving help.

Here’s my thoughts as to why it’s a problem and why and what it means to you as the dutiful son:
- mom has gifted her home to Sissy. That “gifting” will make mom totally ineligible for Medicaid to pay for any custodial program for her. So no State custodial AL, MC or NH eligibility for mom due to gifting.
- gifting places a transfer penalty on any LTC type of Medicaid application. It’s set by # of days too. It’s a division type of math problem based on the day rate State pays for room&board & property value by tax assessor starting date of the Medicaid application. So State that pays $200 a day with house value of $275K is 1,375 days of ineligibility. 1,375 days is almost 4 years of ineligibility!
Sissy has got to realize that as she did this is, it is now 100% her problem, her purse, her wallet to pay for all of moms costs of care should caring for mom get way waaaaay beyond what she can do at home or mom runs out of her own $. Moms gonna be ineligible for facility Medicaid. All property records are keystrokes for a caseworker to find out about. That gifting will be there looming as a penalty for 5 years from the date of the filing Medicaid application for almost all States. It’s not your problem. No es su problema Paz! So if Sissy comes asking you for $ to pay for help for your mom, think hard before you give Sissy a penny.

- if mom was diagnosed with dementia as others have said she may not have been competent or cognitive enough to understand what she signed. That Sissy basically “took advantage of a very adult”.
This is a very real crime. APS / Adult Protective Services can be asked to do an investigation on this.
The issue on this - imho not an attorney opinion - is that mom may not yet have had “harm” from the actions done by your Sister. If mom is still living at the house that once was hers, getting her groceries, all her bills are getting paid, utilities are on, she’s clean & fed, APS might not find problems. Sissy can say “Mom forced me to take the house, $ in the bank as a gift” yada, yada. It’s hard to counteract stuff like this. There’s no real harm to your mom…….yet. The harm will be when mom does not have the $ to pay for AL or MC or NH as there is no house sale $ as the house was gifted and $ in moms bank accounts was drained by Sissy.

So what to do? What do you think Sissy actions are all about? Is she a greedy witch and already has been coming to you to pay for things for mom? OR Did she do this to streamline assets & $ to get all assets outside of probate and Medicaid lookback?
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AlvaDeer Apr 16, 2023
I always so appreciate when you are here to field these questions!
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One word….Lawyer. Dementia patients can not do legal paperwork. In some states not even a divorce. Go to court. My mom was po’d at my brother and asked me to get a new will to cut him out. I refused. I am her POA. She forgot! Sister may be considered “abusing” her authority.
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Fawnby Apr 23, 2023
Dementia patients can sign legal paperwork as long as they know what they’re signing. A lawyer decides whether they understand it. Also people with dementia are not always known to have dementia. They don’t walk around with signs on their heads proclaiming them demented. They can carry on useful and meaningful lives for many years. That includes driving to a lawyer’s office, drawing up a new will and signing it. Or driving from Florida to California. Or hosting a dinner party for 12.
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If your mother is diagnosed to have dementia, I would believe that her signing any documents is invalid. Contact an attorney or the bank who has the deed to the house, or both.

Gena / Touch Matters
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Ok my post should have read “APS called in to look at if Sissy took advantage of a VULNERABLE adult; not a “very” adult. LOL.

on the notary, notary alone really not good enough. Notary really just has to look to see if the person signing is the same name as on the documents. And even then that has issues, eg. JR has same name as Sr and the document doesn’t specify which. I’ve always been told if it’s important, ya gotta have it witnessed by two and they cannot be family or in anyway related or were once related ( no ex husbands) or could ever themselves benefit.

if Sissy is POA for your mom she should never ever do things that directly benefit herself. POA is a legally recognized entity and responsibility, not to be taken casually. So house signed over to her (sissy) name would be total breach of her fiduciary duty as POA, but if she got mom to sign it over to her daughter not the same type of breach of fiduciary duty imho. Still will be an eventual clusterF should mom run out of $ and needs it to pay for care or mom files for Medicaid, but it’s probably more Sissy is clueless & greedy POA imo.
Again OP don’t let your Sisters ill thought out actions become your problems and your costs.
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AZDaughterinLaw Apr 23, 2023
My husband is a notary. If someone seems potentially vulnerable, he has the responsibility to make sure that the person understands the purpose of the document and/or not under pressure by someone to sign it. He has denied notarizing for seniors when they can't express what the document is about and sense they are comfortable with the decision.

There is nothing in the post that indicates that she signed over the house to herself as POA. The mother may have signed it when she was still legally competent (with or without dementia).

Some POA documents may not prevent making real estate transactions or gifts even to the POA.

There are questions to be asked to the sister and/or a lawyer but guess I'm saying is don't jump to conclusions based on the little information we have to go on.
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If your mother has dementia she cannot legally make decisions for herself. So what your sister just pulled is illegal and can bring criminal charges on her like fraud and elder abuse.
Please make a police report and get yourself to a lawyer who specializes in elder law.
I've seen this sort of thing happen many times over the years with families I've worked for. One sibling decides to get cute and sneak their mom or dad with dementia down to a lawyer on the DL to change a will or switch a POA. My husband's friend is lawyer who specializes in estate planning. He also does elder law work. When an elderly client is brought in to change a will or a POA he requires that there be legal paperwork stating that the former POA (if the reason for the change is other than them being deceased) and heirs to a will are aware of the changes. Their permission is not necessary, only their awareness. This practice prevents a whole lot of family problems.
Please have a consultation with a lawyer.
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Jada824 Apr 23, 2023
My point exactly. My sibling brought my mom with dementia to a lawyer amending her trust to benefit him 100%. He even called the lawyer & told her what he wanted done……..
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Consult with an attorney. Every situation like this that I have heard of by friends close to me, has turned into a problem. Make sure your sister doesn’t get a reverse mortgage. they can be used legitimately, yet I’ve never seen it.

i’m making bold statements based on little fact (Will,Poa,etc). Find any attorney to consult with. Some may give you a free consult. Elder abuse cases can be lengthy.
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ANYTHING signed by an individual with dimentia or any other mental incapacity is completely invalid. This is a no brainer. No pun intended .
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Caregiverstress Apr 23, 2023
Actually that isn’t the case. The bar for competency is pretty low legally speaking. For instance, if the person with dementia is able to recognize they own a house they will often be determined competent to decide what to do with it. My father has Alzheimer’s and is in the process of selling his cabins, something I have been urging him to do as I do not want the headache of dealing with them when he is gone. He knows he has cabins but has no idea that it is me who has been working behind the scenes to hire an agent to list them. Once he agreed to sell I said “okay great dad, I’ll find an agent for you”. The agent was already lined up, and I told her all about my dad’s condition and spoke to his attorney to make sure he could legally sign the listing agreement and enter into a contract of sale. His attorney of many years who originally did his trust and POA (which I have) said as long as he still knows he owns property and has stated his intent to sell, he can sign the papers.
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Time to lawyer up. Why was all of this done in secrecy by your sister and then telling you don’t worry about it? I’m going through something very similar and it all sounds fishy to me.

Some siblings are very greedy & sneaky and think they’re entitled to everything.
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Wolfpack Apr 23, 2023
i agree. The words "don't worry about it" along with the refusal show you bank statements should lead you directly to an elder law attorney ASAP.
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My mom added my name to the deed of the family home. It stipulated she would have "Life Use" of the property, and I would be the "silent" owner. The property tax bills came with both our names, with the note "in care of" by mom's name, as in the eyes of our state, she was still the owner of the property. I helped out with minor repairs and up-keep of the property.

Years later, when I took on the role of her cargiver, the situation developed where Medicaid was the best solution to assist me in keeping her in the family home. There was no issue regarding the property, as it was way past the five year look-back period.

Each year, I would go over important documents with mom: POA, Health Care Proxy, Will, Funeral Arrangements, Obituary, and Deed, to make sure she was OK with everything. I would then prepare a sheet that both of us signed and dated noting our review. I wanted it for my record in case anyone (including siblings who were never involved in her care) every questioned my decisions. Regarding the Deed, I always stressed to her she was the owner of the home until her death.

When she died at age 93, I was prepared. Her funeral wishes were followed. When it came to closing the estate, it was a very simple process that involved my attorney filing a death certificate with the County Clerk to confirm ownership of the property transferred to me. My siblings never questioned anything.

Many of the horror stories that occur regarding control over property, bank accounts, etc. might, and I stress might, be avoided if wishes were discussed and reviewed on a regular basis. You note in your profile you are your mom's caregiver. How did your sister get access to the will, etc. I always kept such documents in a locked box. As others have already stated, your situation requires the advice of an attorney. I wish you well.
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elisny Apr 24, 2023
Based on my experience and observations, it is rare for people to be as prepared as you were. Good job!
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Family law atty
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gladimhere Apr 23, 2023
Nope. Elder Law attorney is needed
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