My dad's wallet with everything was stolen. What can I do to help?
Hi all , my 90-year-old dad is currently hospitalized in New York. I live in California. He had his wallet stolen or lost at the hospital, where his aide brought him earlier this week due to a severe UTI. He had several credit cards in the wallet along with his social security number, insurance card, state-issued id, and a written list of all his bank accounts and associated account numbers. I have a general power of attorney but no special authorization to speak on his behalf on any of his accounts. I have two sisters who live in the vicinity, but who are too overworked this week to assist. My dad has dementia and he is beyond frantic. Am I able to freeze his credit as a first step? How do I do that? I do have his social security number. Today I was able to cancel one of his credit cards (and order a replacement) by calling my dad in the hospital while I had the representative on hold and conferencing her in. Nothing is online and I feel it would be a helpful way to monitor his multiple bank accounts in real-time. But again, I am not sure whether I would need a separate power of attorney for each bank. He does not have access to a computer. In his apartment, he has stacks of bank statements out in the open for all to see. Given he suspects that aides have taken items before, I have told him this is not wise. Unfortunately, I am not in NY to help, though I did try to set up a file system during my last trip. I am sure it is a messy stack again because my sisters do not help him organizing his papers. And he's super stubborn and weird about giving up any control. So, it's a total mess and I just want to make sure he has immediate protection. Any advice is greatly appreciated.
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Does dad have a building super or neighbor you can trust to enter the apt? Does dad keep a list of credit card numbers anywhere in the apartment? Do you trust his aide to help with this?
Finally, you MUST freeze dads credit immediately.
.https://www.consumer.ftc.gov/articles/0497-credit-freeze-faqs
It this article are the numbers of the 3 credit bureaus. Freezing his credit would be the best thing to do. I believe this can be done 24/7. Call one of them now and explain the situation.
Start faxing out that POA to everywhere Dad has active accounts. When the crisis is controlled, consolidate into as few as possible. Someone, you, will then take over all financials. Dad can get bills in the mail but you will arrange payments online. Take away his checkbook and credit cards. He doesn't need them. If you don't want to physically take them away just deactivate them and make sure his aides know this.
Why is Dad being cared for by people you don't trust? It sounds like you have other problems. Your sisters may be "overworked" but that isn't as serious a problem as your dad's safety.
It was suggested to me on here one time to make contact by email or mail to the bank and social security office when my sibling attempted to change dad's bank account information behind my back. They all graciously responded and told me what steps needed to be taken. Maybe even ask law enforcement for advice.
Either way, I'm so sorry this has happened.
By the way, way too much information is being kept in that wallet.
Banks can be a PITA about POAs, but like the CCs, at the very least call them and see if they can place a special hold on the accounts. If you explain everything, esp that he had his acct numbers written on papers in his wallet, they should do what they can to protect his account. Worry about gaining access later!
Medicare and SS may need to be contacted about the card losses. Because we moved mom to MC, I couldn't change the address for the statements, etc, so I had to sign up as rep payee (use local office, it isn't too hard and makes everything safer!)
Credit reports should be frozen. I did this to my own for a specific reason. He likely won't need these, so just freeze them. If you know the right information, you can do this online. They should provide a PIN number, in the unlikely event he needs them unfrozen. Only needed for renting, jobs, new credit, etc. At his age, he shouldn't need it. You will have to do this at each bureau as they don't share this - fraud alerts maybe, but not freezing the reports. The numbers to call are menu driven - you really don't get a live person to talk to. If you have that info, you can do this online, from your location. If they mail the PIN, have someone collect those and put them in a SAFE place!
If you filed a police report, you might be able to start with fraud at the credit bureaus. That would at least get the ball rolling.
Definitely this is something that needs to be addressed ASAP!
While family is at it, ask them to help dad secure valuables. He might be misplacing them or outside help could be taking things or he could be gicing things away and forgetting about it.
Thank you so much for the incredibly helpful posts. Here's an update... On Friday, I called one of the three credit bureaus and explained the situation about my dad's wallet. They said they couldn't do anything over the phone and that I would have to mail a photocopy of his s.s. card and valid id, along with a utility bill and cover letter to a P.O. Box in Atlanta, GA. They didn't seem to care that I had a POA and his s.s. #. It wasn't lost on me that collecting all these documents would take weeks, especially given that I am clear across the country.
Yesterday I was actually able to place a freeze on his credit file with all three credit bureaus online (Equifax, Experian, and Transunion) as well as put a fraud alert with one that is relayed to the other two agencies. I do have pins and will store them in a safe place, if we need to unfreeze his credit one day in the future for any reason.
One of my sisters who lives in NY has now agreed to take care of the individual banks to check the balances on his accounts and alert them about what happened to prevent any unauthorized withdrawals. It doesn't help that my two sisters in NY don't get along, and feel that it's the other's responsibility. As you might imagine, I don't feel comfortable flying to NYC right now with the pandemic, I think having frozen his credit is a big relief for all.
Yes, his dementia is pretty advanced and he should definitely hand over his finances and bank papers. He is home from the hospital now, and we are going to make sure he carries very little with him, certainly not his s.s. card or bank info. I have offered to get all his accounts online - and create spreadsheets, but he has refused.
It felt like I was little more than a stranger off the street when I was calling banks and credit bureaus calling to cancel credit cards and inquire about credit freezes. The truth is he lacks the foresight and trust in us to manage his finances. We are all girls; he trusts my brother-in-law more because he is a guy and an attorney. This was a crisis waiting to happen.
I appreciate all your wisdom so much!
Thank you for the update.
You do realize that your POA is in effect since Dad is no longer competent. Meaning that, you can take over his finances. Its no longer what he wants but what he needs. If he must have a wallet, put an expired drivers licence in it. In junk mail you are always getting fake credit cards in mail. Maybe even play money that looks like real. If he likes keys, old car and house keys.