I am not sure that the people I am thinking of appointing can do this, based on experience with elder. Now, the obvious answer is choose someone else. So what is plan b?

I am going to talk to my attorney about. But have any of you found yourself in similar situation? I 've not signed anything just have drafts.

But I am rethinking some things.

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It does help. I think the assignees for advanced directive will be fine. DPOA no. One not proactive, reactive and has to be told what to do. The second has not managed money well at all. So I have my answer really. As I said, these are drafts. And coming to realization, that although family, not best suited to this task. That happens. And will.

I am going to be one of the orphan elders. Just trying to get my stuff handled.
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Seg, I think it depends on how difficult the job will be once you—um—you know. To be very honest, I was my mom’s POA, executor, etc. but she kept such painfully exhaustive records and directives, I didn’t have much to do but follow them. If you have lots of assets and lots of family who will start a war over all those assets, like my in-law family, then you will need a lawyer as a go-between and make sure everything is spelled out in minutiae as to who gets what.
My in-law family owned a business and what happened after they passed and the business went belly up took three attorneys and would have made a wonderful show on FOX.
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Segoline, I fully understand your situation. For myself, I have no siblings and have no children, but do have a sig other. He's very sharp when it comes to finances but it a bit befuddled when it comes to medical care decisions.

My Elder Law Attorney asked for "primary" and "secondary" for the Power of Attorney forms. The financial one was easy, I was able to appoint the law Firm as secondary, as this Firm had a half dozen Elder Law Attorneys.

The secondary for the Medical POA had my head swirling, as I couldn't appoint the Firm.

For the Will/Trust, I did appoint sig other as primary, and the Firm as secondary. And sig other did the same thing as I had told him if his grown children give me any grief, I want to turn the Trust to a stronger voice, thus the Firm.

Hope this helps.
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