It has been a long year since my brother was given up for dying by doctors.
Now
1. his lung cancer is undetectable on CT
2. His medication seems to be optimized and he is off the narcotics and antianxiety medications from the past
3. His blood sugar levels are stabilized
4. His mental status may be optimized and he interacts appropriately with other although he is not as outgoing as in the past
5. He cares for his hygiene and dexterity has improved along with ambulation skills ( cane occasionally)
6. He is telling family members that he wants to get back on his own, but we have no idea how to help him as despite progress there are critical areas that must be covered:
1. Medication.. he is not able to set up and take medication as prescribed
2. Food... he eats food that has been prepared if he likes it
3. Self care...he bathes, shaves, dresses, but does not clean up other than dishes to sing and straightening linen ( this is improving gradually)
4. Housing.. the place where he lived has actually been torn down and his old friends are scattered somewhere (he did a lot of his impriving and regaining of interest since the covid mess, so lost touch with them etc.
The physician who has kept faith in him during all these months told him flat out that he is incapable of providing the care for himself that family has been able to provide and we gave him a list of skills he needs that have gotten rusty in all these months and he tries to work at them.
His income is just Barely too much for him to qualify for anything apparently, but are there any ideas for services we need to look into... to help him make this final leap or provide the backup he needs.
Thanks
If he really wants to be independent then he really needs to prove that he can handle it.
If you have to set everything up and work it all out it tells me that he is not capable of living alone.
I recommend having him put a plan together and make the needed phone calls to find out about things like mobile meals and senior housing. If he can't pull it off he really needs to be in care or with family.
He needs to reintegrate himself, you doing it isn't him integrating back to life. For his benefit make him do it.