I know a lot of woman the husband handles the finances and they have no idea where to start, is that you? If not, then take over. You are ruining your credit by not taking over. I don't write the checks, but I reconcile the statement so I know where the money goes. I have set my credit card to pay thru the app, love it. If only me, I think I would do this with all our reg bills. My nephew, gson and daughter pay this way.
My Mom lost the ability to pay her bills early on. First, she couldn't total her checkbook. Then, her handwriting got unreadable. So, I took over and signed her checks POA.
You will need a quiet place where you can sit down and concentrate on what ur doing. Separate everything in piles. Utilities usually do not charge late fees. Credit Cards do. So, I would start there and pay at least the minimum amount due. Mortgage definitely gets paid. Taxes, depends on where you live. Ours are quarterly. My Mom chose to pay monthly to budget her money. Pay something if they are behind. Always pay something, it shows good faith.
As an emergency/temporary measure, you can pay the bills - via card over phone or via electronic transfer.
Sneak them off his desk one by one, pay & remove or return (minus the opened envelope to avoid an issue over that).
The longer term plan will be to move all the bills over to your name only. You will need either his permission or POA to remove his name.
Do you hold an enduring POA? If so, it may be time to evoke it. The Doctor usually must sign a letter he is not capable of making financial decisions for this to take effect.
A middle step could be a 'therapeutic fib' to why the bill needs to be in JOINT names (not just his). A special offer, a discount for couples??
Of course paying the bills depends on having access to the funds!
If there is a joint bank account - good. If not & funds are all controlled by your DH... not so good. You will need POA. Unless again you can get creative with a fib.. to open a new joint bank account: the bank requested it, a better account, less fees etc.
We get offers all the time to switch banks. I would use that. Oh look at this new deal! Opening TWO joint accounts would be my plan. One with a small balance for day to day purchases. The other with more $, that you pay the bills from. This one you destroy his card & keep yours safely out of his reach.
How can you expect help from him if he has dementia? Dementia means he’s no longer capable of such a task. Follow the advice already given, without any further discussion with your husband. I changed all of my dad’s finances without him knowing a thing. Got his banking changed to online, all bills emailed to me, forwarded his mail to my home, and he never touched it all again. It was a kindness
~Get bills set up to be paid online, automatically each month. Discontinue paper bills entirely. ~Intercept the bills at the mailbox, pay them yourself immediately, and he may not even realize it. ~While he's sleeping, gather up the bills that have piled up, pay them, and that's that.
My Mom lost the ability to pay her bills early on. First, she couldn't total her checkbook. Then, her handwriting got unreadable. So, I took over and signed her checks POA.
You will need a quiet place where you can sit down and concentrate on what ur doing. Separate everything in piles. Utilities usually do not charge late fees. Credit Cards do. So, I would start there and pay at least the minimum amount due. Mortgage definitely gets paid. Taxes, depends on where you live. Ours are quarterly. My Mom chose to pay monthly to budget her money. Pay something if they are behind. Always pay something, it shows good faith.
Don‘t you have access to banking, mail box, bills, CC?
Sneak them off his desk one by one, pay & remove or return (minus the opened envelope to avoid an issue over that).
The longer term plan will be to move all the bills over to your name only. You will need either his permission or POA to remove his name.
Do you hold an enduring POA? If so, it may be time to evoke it. The Doctor usually must sign a letter he is not capable of making financial decisions for this to take effect.
A middle step could be a 'therapeutic fib' to why the bill needs to be in JOINT names (not just his). A special offer, a discount for couples??
Of course paying the bills depends on having access to the funds!
If there is a joint bank account - good. If not & funds are all controlled by your DH... not so good. You will need POA. Unless again you can get creative with a fib.. to open a new joint bank account: the bank requested it, a better account, less fees etc.
We get offers all the time to switch banks. I would use that. Oh look at this new deal!
Opening TWO joint accounts would be my plan. One with a small balance for day to day purchases. The other with more $, that you pay the bills from. This one you destroy his card & keep yours safely out of his reach.
~Intercept the bills at the mailbox, pay them yourself immediately, and he may not even realize it.
~While he's sleeping, gather up the bills that have piled up, pay them, and that's that.