He calls me sl*t. Horse, fat, makes lies and gets peope to feel sorry for him. He stated if he goes down he’ll make sure I go down. Should I put him in a home?
We need to know your situation. Does "he" have dementia? Are you his caregiver? Have you ruled out problems such as UTI? Are you his POA? Is this unusual behavior for him (that is to say was he a calm, gentle and rational person before this? Do fill in your profile for us so we know a bit more about you.
Yours is another example of insufficient information. I go to your profile and find nothing there. You posted under Alzheimer's, is that his diagnosis? If not, what? Do you live together or do you visit? If you live together, do you have authority to evict him? What effect does his behavior have on you? How long have you been tolerating this?
I assume you're asking the forum what can you do? What are your options? If he has AD, loss of inhibition and sensitivity is one of the unfortunate symptoms. Certainly his verbal behavior is mental and emotional abuse. Abuse doesn't have to be physical. The solution, assuming there's no clinical intervention that can modify his behavior, is separation. If you've tolerated enough, and I hope you have, and he can be left on his own, you need to leave. If not, he needs to be placed in a care facility. I'm sure he would resist that choice, but if he can no longer make rational decisions because of his illness, you must. If you don't have the authority to make healthcare decisions for him, call your Area Agency on Aging and get a social worker involved.
Who owns or rents the place where you both live? If your friend does, do you have the right to ‘put him in a home’? Do you know anything about costs, and whether he can get Medicaid? What is wrong with him anyway? You need to do something to stop all this, but it sounds as though you need to know a lot more about ‘the system’. Is there some reason why you can’t move out? What does he mean by ‘if he goes down, he’ll make sure I go down’.
If you can give a bit more information, posters can suggest where you go for help about all this. Stay with us.
Yes, I would place your friend in a home. You certainly don’t deserve to be treated like he is treating you. I realize that he has ALZ but that doesn’t mean that you should be hurt by him.
Please think of yourself as an equal to your friend. You matter just as much.
Best wishes to you and let us know how things are going.
Are you his caregiver?
Have you ruled out problems such as UTI?
Are you his POA?
Is this unusual behavior for him (that is to say was he a calm, gentle and rational person before this?
Do fill in your profile for us so we know a bit more about you.
I assume you're asking the forum what can you do? What are your options? If he has AD, loss of inhibition and sensitivity is one of the unfortunate symptoms. Certainly his verbal behavior is mental and emotional abuse. Abuse doesn't have to be physical. The solution, assuming there's no clinical intervention that can modify his behavior, is separation. If you've tolerated enough, and I hope you have, and he can be left on his own, you need to leave. If not, he needs to be placed in a care facility. I'm sure he would resist that choice, but if he can no longer make rational decisions because of his illness, you must. If you don't have the authority to make healthcare decisions for him, call your Area Agency on Aging and get a social worker involved.
If you can give a bit more information, posters can suggest where you go for help about all this. Stay with us.
Please think of yourself as an equal to your friend. You matter just as much.
Best wishes to you and let us know how things are going.