I am so frustrated. I took my mom to Dr to see if she had dementia. Some of you advised writing note to Dr. so I wrote up some of the issues ( not showering, confusion, missed or mixed up meds, hoarding etc. )Dr walked into visit with note in hand and asked me if I wrote it. I was a little taken back that she did this in front of mom when I was going for discreet and hoping for her to help. Now mom is more uncooperative than before. She has had 2 UTI’s since being here end of November. Finally took her to urgent care because she was confused and doing odd things (bought 40 hamburgers, fries and 20 diet Coke’s on a random day. Nobody to eat it all so had to dump out all but her 1 drink and she threw the rest in freezer to eat later) Dr gave us a referral for mental health because of her depression and to see if we could get answers. If I mention anything about her hygiene she says she doesn’t want to be treated like a child and wishes she were dead. I have tried everything but calling in someone to assist her with showers because she flips out about it but I feel like it’s a vicious cycle. She sits in room 22 hours a day drinks Diet Coke and goes 2 weeks without showers. Wearing same clothing to bed and through days. She’s causing the UTIs by doing this but refuses help in any way. She wants hugs and physical contact but is greasy and stinks. She’s doing everything she can against herself but is constantly pissed at me because I’m doing something about it. I know in my heart she is mentally ill. How the heck do you get a diagnosis and a direction?!