How did you explain taking time off of work for caregiving when you re-entered the job market?

After providing four years of care I was finally able to return to the work force in my profession. It definitely was not easy. At the beginning of that four years I completed a master's degree which may have helped. By the time I found work I had had the degree for three years.

How did I do it? Thinking outside the box, and started looking in less competitive markets. I moved 450 miles away, sold my home and went on with my life. That position did not work out. Within six months I started looking for positions closer to home. After being there for a year I was able to find work within 120 miles of home and my kids and families. I have now been here for about a year and this is my home.

I learned I much prefer small communities and am enjoying life here. Getting ready to build a house and making that permanent commitment.

It can happen but you need to be willing to update skills and make any changes necessary. Is it hard? You bet, the hardest thing I ever did was that 450 mile move and I do not have a spouse or other person that made that move with me. But it has worked out wonderfully! Thank you mom for the strength and independence you taught me.

Yes that’s how they roll...

The current employee/employment atmosphere has changed since I began my career in 1979.
Loyalty really doesn’t exist anymore as employers know they can get someone else to do the job and pay them way less to boot. The companies take advantage of the person’s youth and inexperience and hire them not only with a lower rate but not enough hours for you, the employee, to be able to even get healthcare benefits.

My advice to you is to keep looking and eventually you will find an opportunity. Takes a lot of effort and let down but that’s life.
I myself am happy to have retirement on my radar now vs decades in the future.

And negotiate well anyway at your interview to get that hourly rate you requested because THEY need you now.

Tech skills are needed for any job these days too. 

Hang in there!

My caregiver experience just ended after 2 years, my brother's wife has been out for caregiver duty for about that long plus. So far, employers are dropping the ball on doing the right thing. I stayed relatively current with my field though. There's more going on with the opportunities that I did get interviews for. Contract positions from Thanksgiving to the New Year. Projects that weren't done by FT employees for 11 months and they want you to throw your body on the grenade & save them from eating the loss that they were there for 11 complete months, getting salary & benefits and didn't accomplish their projects. They don't want to pay much during the holidays and being contract there are no benefits. End of the day, you're babysitting the company during corporate holidays that FT staff are extending with accumulated PTO/vacation time.

Thanksgiving 2017, the contract position I didn't get, was later contacted by a recruiter for the same position at the start of the 2nd week of January 2018. Pay rate was lower $ 20-25/hour, I originally submitted for $ 27/hour. The 2018 recruiter told me his candidate got an offer back when I interviewed for it a couple weeks before Thanksgiving 2017. His submission declined and never joined the team for that project. They didn't do anything about their project in December 2017 and I suspect they will do nothing about it again, until Thanksgiving 2018, it's how they roll.

I am looking now, as my Mom and her hubby moved to a retirement community three months ago. I am very discouraged and not knowing where to turn.

cool. thanks

transplantwest I'm in Canada so Bay Street is Toronto's version of Wall Street

Ashlynne, What is the "Bay Street" "THING"? You're experience was entirely different than mine, employers saw how I anticipated an up coming need and found a way to acomodate that need. Ie: introducing strangers into the house, preparation for CNA, housekeeper etc. I've seen four of my family members through the end of their lives and not once were they seen as "baggage". I covered all my bases before returning to work, to be sure I could be on the job when I was on the job. Maybe that's the difference.

I did the "Bay Street" thing for many years and the harsh truth is that employers want someone to be there reliably during working hours. They also want younger employees without baggage. If you're older and have (elder care) baggage which means you might take off at any point, you're doomed.

If the elder is now deceased, your age and time out of the work force ... so behind in rapidly advancing technology (as I have become over the past 6 years) is against you as well. My recommendation would be to grow a small home based business.

I listed the time with familiy member as I would a job. And listed the responsibilities, just as I would with any position. ie: accurately assesed and communicated changes/progression in behavoirs to medical providers, managed medications and maintained safe environment, anticipated and accomodated on going needs based on rate of decline. Sounds kind of fancy, but there is a huge learning curve, and this was 15 years ago. Much more availablity of info today. And I will always recommend the Alzheimers groups. Those men and women shared their experiences and saved my bacon. I could take their advise and apply it to my own situation. An example, a "lil old lady" explained to me several ways, (that I understood) to disable Dads car, to postpone the issue of him driving. (My Mother, had JUST passed and I needed time to assess where he was and how best to handle it, they had also just moved to a new home in a new state.)

FMLA! It doesn't guarantee pay, but it will protect your job.

I don't think most employers want to hear of any caregiving obligations. They want you at work at set hours and they are generally do have any sympathies for the difficulties you face if they change your hours, expect you to work late or earlier than your normal hours. They are clueless to the arrangements you have to make to hire help to be with your elder and how it is difficult to change these people's hours.

It all goes back to the fact that caring for elders isn't respected by others. Most subscribe to the notion " I have my life to live, I will put my parents in an NH AL arrangement and carry on." If your employer has neglected his/her responsibilities with their parents or in laws don't expect them to respect you trying to care for your parents or in laws. It just will not happen.

It may have to change with the sheer volume of elderly currently retiring. However, the current mindset of many adult children is to deny their parents even need any assistance. They would much rather spend every afternoon with their children/grandchildren sitting at baseball, football, soccer games then missing a game to take grandmom shopping, banking, to the doctor appointment or out to the diner for a meal and conversation. Problem is the elderly parent doesn't have endless amounts of time to live, they need help and visits now not whenever the grandchild doesn't have a game. We need to put the elders first. Taking a grandchild to their great grandparent for a visit would not be a bad thing either, let them learn how to talk and relate to elderly people.
It could be nice for both of them.

These days resumes get scanned for key words before they get read.
If your résumé includes a chronology of your jobs as most do, include the gap and list it. Be proud, many people will relate to you. Interviewers have sick parents as well.
Maybe your objective should embrace the situation by stating something like.....looking to resume my career as a ...

I would mention it, but keep it brief. You resume needs to be focused on your attributes and you skills. When you do interview make sure to not dwell on caregiving too much if it comes up, make sure to leave the impression the caregiving situation is resolved. You do not want to give the impression that your mind will be on something else than your job.

Best of luck
L

Thank you to EVERYONE who replied to Perseverance's 6.8.13 question concerning 're-entering the job market after taking time off to provide caregiving'. All the comments were so very helpful to me, thanks again for this timely sharing.

I have gotten a job now but i did explain during my interview about my caregiving situation with my mom and that I had to leave other job because of my late working hours. So far this job is going good and the hours are perfect, Im working while mom is at adult daycare and still have a couple hours to myself each day which usually all I feel like doing is sleeping LOL

I promised God I would be there for both Dad and Mom till the end. They won't let me leave and every time I do some disaster happens. A result has been re-locating them to ALF. Now I find myself jobless as well as caring for immediate neighbors as well w/o compensation from the facility. What do you do when the neighbor is standing outside his apt. in PJ's begging for help. I carried him inside only to be ignored by staff because POA was "on the way". I find it shameful that elderly are @ the mercy of corporations are more concerned about liability than caregiving.

Thanks, all for your helpful answers.

DGinGA, do you recommend mentioning the caregiving in a cover letter or resume? Mom is now in a NH so my FT caregiving is not needed.

I work in Human Resources and would understand the explanation that someone took time out of the workforce to care for an elderly or ill relative. My concern would be whether that relative would continue to need the care, or if the candidate would be likely to jump into FMLA soon after being hired. In my own situation, I took a year off to care for someone who was dying of cancer. After she passed, I got back out in the workforce and most prospective employers were very understanding - especially since my loved one died and would not continue to need my care.

2 dogs, 1 cat, my dad, my husband, myself, and an adult daughter coming home SOON, I am going to go for it. Wyndie & balexander, thanks for the shove out of the nest, I feel like I can do this (at least the interview, ha!)

Makes sense to me! You said you are "finding" and then you "fear: which makes me wonder if you have experienced this, or just if you are concerned about it. Of course, not getting an interview or a job does not necessarily mean that your caregiving is the determining factor. I would go with what you feel right about. Personally I think I would include it somewhere, somehow. I like Wyndie's suggestion about breaking down the skills, if they are applicable,

Thanks, all for your answers and stories! I know caring for elderly parents is more and more common.

Some of you sat NOT to place the caregiving in cover letter or resume - but here's what I'm finding - without stating what I've been doing the last year and half, I fear it immediately disqualifies me even though I'm educated (masters in business). I thought that by placing it in my cover letter, I address it in a more personal manner, while also ensuring that the matter is resolved (she's in a loving NH).

Good for you, 58yroldchild! If you believe you can make it work, you will be able to convince a prospective employer. Good luck with your job search.

Balexander, you are right, it is no different than being a working mom. I have the second interview tomorrow morning. My husband I talked it out, we believe this can work. Two days a week, dad is by himself, the other three he is the senior center from 9 to 3, husband is home by 5:15 p.m. He is pretty cognitive, wears a life alert button, there is also a life alert console in the kitchen. Provided I am hired, I will be about 7 minutes from home. So I am going to put my big girl pants on tomorrow and let them know about dad. Thanks to all of you for the helping me to "woman up" and just tell the truth, you all are AWESOME!!!

I worked in the trucking industry for the last 20 years...my mom's health has just recently in the last 3 years come to the point where I had to take FMLA the last year just to ensure it wouldn't affect my attendance. I worked for Fedex and it also h elped to ensure I had to be approved for time off. But eventually the stress of my job and taking care of my mom was too much. Job hours had changed drastically and can't take care of her when I work nights so I ended up quitting and struggled to find a good job so I'm working two parttime jobs now to get by. But my mom has more of my attention which does seem to make her happy.

I would not include it in the resume or cover letter. If it needs to be explained I would have a statement memorized which I could state in a matter of fact
type manner. Most people have encountered such needs if they have reached mid life. If you are interviewing with someone very young who has not faced such challenges yet, then I would try to avoid the subject. The existence of family leave for caregiving is more accepted than in the past especially for
child care. Elder care isn't always as respected unfortunately.

Good Luck.
Elizabeth

I have hired many people in the past and I do know that childcare is something we took into consideration when hiring someone. I think it is true that if you decide to mention it, then you also need to assure your prospective employer that you have coverage for your family member and it will not interfere with your job. I also like what Cindy said in her expert answer..."If I can do care giving then I can handle any job!" You might look at what you do and break that down further...I am a capable multi-tasker, able to handle finances, set appointments, etc. There are so many things that we do as a caretaker, but many times we take their worth for granted rather than make our talents shine. I have to say this is the most difficult 24/7 job I have personally EVER had and after this, every thing else is a piece of cake!

You are right! Honesty is the best policy. I retired early in 2009. Decided to go back to work Sept 2012 to help my grandaughter, who is in college, pay for a car. Worked Sept thru February 2nd when my Momma got sick. My boss was wonderful about it and gave me a leave of absence for as long as it takes to do my job for my Momma.

You can apply for FMLA ONLY after having worked for 12 months (have worked 1,250 hours during the 12 months prior to the start of leave) for your new employer/company. Also, your employer has to have a certain minimum number of employees for it to be mandated to provide FMLA. You can get up to 26 weeks off per 12 months. If you need more time off in a 12 month time period, they don't have to give it to you.

I forgot to mention, should you get the job, apply for FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act,) through your human resources. I did this on my last job to protect it as I was having to leave work to attend to both of my parents. FMLA protects your job in the event of family emergency, check it out!

As galileo43 said....I would list the time away as "Family Medical Leave". If you can fit in any continuing education during your time "off" (which I realize isn't easy to do when caregiving.....maybe online?? Sometimes there are free online CEU courses, and I've also found sites for my profession where I pay a flat fee per year and can take as many CEU classes as I can fit in for that year.) it can be helpful to show that you have continued to keep up with your field/profession, etc. even while not actively working in it. List the CEU classes on your resume, with the topic and DATE you obtained.

I also need to reenter the workforce, I was laid off 3 years ago. I took care of my dad staying at his home 3 hours away for a week every month in 2011, moved him in with us one year ago. I had a promising interview last week, but never mentioned the caretaking scenario because I was afraid it would taint my chances. After reading this timely post, and providing I get a second interview, I now feel I shouldn't be afraid to bring it up, invariably, something will happen at some point. Many hugs to ALL of you who responded to Perseverance question with honest answers from the heart! And Perseverance, you asked the question I was getting ready to. I wish you the best in your job search, it is so hard out there. Good luck!