How did you explain taking time off of work for caregiving when you re-entered the job market?

When my sister was very ill with cancer I relocated to where she was to take care of her, which also I needed to find a job to care for my expenses. I didn't put any information in my resume or cover letter about it. I got an interview and during the interview I just explained what was going on with things. My employer was very compassionate and was willing to accommodate me any way they could. I assured them that I had most of the ground covered except for extreme emergencies. My niece and sister's friends were awesome in helping me out, so I never had to take any real time off until the very end. If they are really interested in employing you and you advise them of your situation in advance I'm sure it will iron itself out. Good luck

This is really no different from what happens when a mother takes off time to care for children before reentering the job market. Employers don't have a problem with the fact that the job applicant wasn't working fo this reason unless the period of time is long enough for the applicant to no longer be up-to-date in his/her field. Employers are always worried that childcare will cause undue absences and need to be reassured that you have everything well under control. The same is true if you are the caregiver of an elderly person who is ill. You just have to convince your prospective employer that you have worked things out, including a backup plan such that your job as a caregiver will not interfere with your ability to do the job.

Just moved mom into a small, home-style ALF and now I am also looking into the job market. I just entered it on my resume as my job for the time period I quit work to be caregiver. It was a huge job and I don't think we should discount it. Of course, if you are still going to be caring for mom around the job then I like what angelwhyspers said about explaining the situation during an interview.

I feel honesty is the best policy. You had a duty and a prospective employer should realize that this is an obligation you did not turn away from. What with the aging population we have today, employers should realize that it will be affecting many of their employees and should make reasonable accommodations in regard to this issue.
Of course, you should give an honest assessment as to how long the caregiving will be going on and let the person make their decision to hire you based on the company's needs. Good luck to you.

You tell the truth. As caring for aging parents becomes part of the everyday scenario in corporate America, the more family caregivers are forthcoming with employers, the sooner businesses and corporations will start listening. There is absolutely no shame in caring for a beloved family member. If you need to...remind the person interviewing you that if you can do caregiving, you can probably do anything!

I volutarilry left the job market after two years of temping following a job loss because I planned to file for divorce the following week and would have uo sell my house and deal and live with a vindictive spouse. My dad was going downhill fast after 41 years of diabetes and I was making frequent out of state visits. He fell and I spent three months overseeing his care and burial. Less than a year later, I was diagnosed with Stage III Breast Cancer. I made it through that alone, then updated all of my tech skills and started a second Masters,in Global Higher Ed and life long learning for adults, when I turned 50. I have done some temp and grant funded work. I explain my gap as family medical

Wasnt done yet...followed by a serious illness that I have recovered from, with a few limitations. I am probably healthier than many of my peers. If a potential employer has a problem with that then that is somewhere I dont want towork.

I also need to reenter the workforce, I was laid off 3 years ago. I took care of my dad staying at his home 3 hours away for a week every month in 2011, moved him in with us one year ago. I had a promising interview last week, but never mentioned the caretaking scenario because I was afraid it would taint my chances. After reading this timely post, and providing I get a second interview, I now feel I shouldn't be afraid to bring it up, invariably, something will happen at some point. Many hugs to ALL of you who responded to Perseverance question with honest answers from the heart! And Perseverance, you asked the question I was getting ready to. I wish you the best in your job search, it is so hard out there. Good luck!

As galileo43 said....I would list the time away as "Family Medical Leave". If you can fit in any continuing education during your time "off" (which I realize isn't easy to do when caregiving.....maybe online?? Sometimes there are free online CEU courses, and I've also found sites for my profession where I pay a flat fee per year and can take as many CEU classes as I can fit in for that year.) it can be helpful to show that you have continued to keep up with your field/profession, etc. even while not actively working in it. List the CEU classes on your resume, with the topic and DATE you obtained.

I forgot to mention, should you get the job, apply for FMLA (Family Medical Leave Act,) through your human resources. I did this on my last job to protect it as I was having to leave work to attend to both of my parents. FMLA protects your job in the event of family emergency, check it out!

You can apply for FMLA ONLY after having worked for 12 months (have worked 1,250 hours during the 12 months prior to the start of leave) for your new employer/company. Also, your employer has to have a certain minimum number of employees for it to be mandated to provide FMLA. You can get up to 26 weeks off per 12 months. If you need more time off in a 12 month time period, they don't have to give it to you.

You are right! Honesty is the best policy. I retired early in 2009. Decided to go back to work Sept 2012 to help my grandaughter, who is in college, pay for a car. Worked Sept thru February 2nd when my Momma got sick. My boss was wonderful about it and gave me a leave of absence for as long as it takes to do my job for my Momma.

I have hired many people in the past and I do know that childcare is something we took into consideration when hiring someone. I think it is true that if you decide to mention it, then you also need to assure your prospective employer that you have coverage for your family member and it will not interfere with your job. I also like what Cindy said in her expert answer..."If I can do care giving then I can handle any job!" You might look at what you do and break that down further...I am a capable multi-tasker, able to handle finances, set appointments, etc. There are so many things that we do as a caretaker, but many times we take their worth for granted rather than make our talents shine. I have to say this is the most difficult 24/7 job I have personally EVER had and after this, every thing else is a piece of cake!

I would not include it in the resume or cover letter. If it needs to be explained I would have a statement memorized which I could state in a matter of fact
type manner. Most people have encountered such needs if they have reached mid life. If you are interviewing with someone very young who has not faced such challenges yet, then I would try to avoid the subject. The existence of family leave for caregiving is more accepted than in the past especially for
child care. Elder care isn't always as respected unfortunately.

Good Luck.
Elizabeth

I worked in the trucking industry for the last 20 years...my mom's health has just recently in the last 3 years come to the point where I had to take FMLA the last year just to ensure it wouldn't affect my attendance. I worked for Fedex and it also h elped to ensure I had to be approved for time off. But eventually the stress of my job and taking care of my mom was too much. Job hours had changed drastically and can't take care of her when I work nights so I ended up quitting and struggled to find a good job so I'm working two parttime jobs now to get by. But my mom has more of my attention which does seem to make her happy.

Balexander, you are right, it is no different than being a working mom. I have the second interview tomorrow morning. My husband I talked it out, we believe this can work. Two days a week, dad is by himself, the other three he is the senior center from 9 to 3, husband is home by 5:15 p.m. He is pretty cognitive, wears a life alert button, there is also a life alert console in the kitchen. Provided I am hired, I will be about 7 minutes from home. So I am going to put my big girl pants on tomorrow and let them know about dad. Thanks to all of you for the helping me to "woman up" and just tell the truth, you all are AWESOME!!!

Good for you, 58yroldchild! If you believe you can make it work, you will be able to convince a prospective employer. Good luck with your job search.

Thanks, all for your answers and stories! I know caring for elderly parents is more and more common.

Some of you sat NOT to place the caregiving in cover letter or resume - but here's what I'm finding - without stating what I've been doing the last year and half, I fear it immediately disqualifies me even though I'm educated (masters in business). I thought that by placing it in my cover letter, I address it in a more personal manner, while also ensuring that the matter is resolved (she's in a loving NH).

Makes sense to me! You said you are "finding" and then you "fear: which makes me wonder if you have experienced this, or just if you are concerned about it. Of course, not getting an interview or a job does not necessarily mean that your caregiving is the determining factor. I would go with what you feel right about. Personally I think I would include it somewhere, somehow. I like Wyndie's suggestion about breaking down the skills, if they are applicable,

2 dogs, 1 cat, my dad, my husband, myself, and an adult daughter coming home SOON, I am going to go for it. Wyndie & balexander, thanks for the shove out of the nest, I feel like I can do this (at least the interview, ha!)

I work in Human Resources and would understand the explanation that someone took time out of the workforce to care for an elderly or ill relative. My concern would be whether that relative would continue to need the care, or if the candidate would be likely to jump into FMLA soon after being hired. In my own situation, I took a year off to care for someone who was dying of cancer. After she passed, I got back out in the workforce and most prospective employers were very understanding - especially since my loved one died and would not continue to need my care.

Thanks, all for your helpful answers.

DGinGA, do you recommend mentioning the caregiving in a cover letter or resume? Mom is now in a NH so my FT caregiving is not needed.

I promised God I would be there for both Dad and Mom till the end. They won't let me leave and every time I do some disaster happens. A result has been re-locating them to ALF. Now I find myself jobless as well as caring for immediate neighbors as well w/o compensation from the facility. What do you do when the neighbor is standing outside his apt. in PJ's begging for help. I carried him inside only to be ignored by staff because POA was "on the way". I find it shameful that elderly are @ the mercy of corporations are more concerned about liability than caregiving.

I have gotten a job now but i did explain during my interview about my caregiving situation with my mom and that I had to leave other job because of my late working hours. So far this job is going good and the hours are perfect, Im working while mom is at adult daycare and still have a couple hours to myself each day which usually all I feel like doing is sleeping LOL

Thank you to EVERYONE who replied to Perseverance's 6.8.13 question concerning 're-entering the job market after taking time off to provide caregiving'. All the comments were so very helpful to me, thanks again for this timely sharing.

These days resumes get scanned for key words before they get read.
If your résumé includes a chronology of your jobs as most do, include the gap and list it. Be proud, many people will relate to you. Interviewers have sick parents as well.
Maybe your objective should embrace the situation by stating something like.....looking to resume my career as a ...

I would mention it, but keep it brief. You resume needs to be focused on your attributes and you skills. When you do interview make sure to not dwell on caregiving too much if it comes up, make sure to leave the impression the caregiving situation is resolved. You do not want to give the impression that your mind will be on something else than your job.

Best of luck
L

I don't think most employers want to hear of any caregiving obligations. They want you at work at set hours and they are generally do have any sympathies for the difficulties you face if they change your hours, expect you to work late or earlier than your normal hours. They are clueless to the arrangements you have to make to hire help to be with your elder and how it is difficult to change these people's hours.

It all goes back to the fact that caring for elders isn't respected by others. Most subscribe to the notion " I have my life to live, I will put my parents in an NH AL arrangement and carry on." If your employer has neglected his/her responsibilities with their parents or in laws don't expect them to respect you trying to care for your parents or in laws. It just will not happen.

It may have to change with the sheer volume of elderly currently retiring. However, the current mindset of many adult children is to deny their parents even need any assistance. They would much rather spend every afternoon with their children/grandchildren sitting at baseball, football, soccer games then missing a game to take grandmom shopping, banking, to the doctor appointment or out to the diner for a meal and conversation. Problem is the elderly parent doesn't have endless amounts of time to live, they need help and visits now not whenever the grandchild doesn't have a game. We need to put the elders first. Taking a grandchild to their great grandparent for a visit would not be a bad thing either, let them learn how to talk and relate to elderly people.
It could be nice for both of them.

FMLA! It doesn't guarantee pay, but it will protect your job.

I listed the time with familiy member as I would a job. And listed the responsibilities, just as I would with any position. ie: accurately assesed and communicated changes/progression in behavoirs to medical providers, managed medications and maintained safe environment, anticipated and accomodated on going needs based on rate of decline. Sounds kind of fancy, but there is a huge learning curve, and this was 15 years ago. Much more availablity of info today. And I will always recommend the Alzheimers groups. Those men and women shared their experiences and saved my bacon. I could take their advise and apply it to my own situation. An example, a "lil old lady" explained to me several ways, (that I understood) to disable Dads car, to postpone the issue of him driving. (My Mother, had JUST passed and I needed time to assess where he was and how best to handle it, they had also just moved to a new home in a new state.)

I did the "Bay Street" thing for many years and the harsh truth is that employers want someone to be there reliably during working hours. They also want younger employees without baggage. If you're older and have (elder care) baggage which means you might take off at any point, you're doomed.

If the elder is now deceased, your age and time out of the work force ... so behind in rapidly advancing technology (as I have become over the past 6 years) is against you as well. My recommendation would be to grow a small home based business.